Conversations with!
by lebunnylub
Summary: Countries talking to Cleverbot, what will unfold? Probably nothing much but it's sure to be confusing and/or funny. First chapter may have implied rape. I don't know.
1. Italy

A long but slightly funny conversation Italy had with Cleverbot, it gets pretty weird. I tried to do a semi-decent Italy, tell me how I did, kay? Um...I may do more if you have a request I'll do other characters. Maybe Prussia next?

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or cleverbot. Thank God right?

* * *

><p>User: I'm Italy! Ve~<p>

Cleverbot: I'm American.

User: Are you Alfred? How are you?

Cleverbot: What are you?

User: I'm Italy, America.

Cleverbot: Where in America.

User: No in Europe! I'm the country shaped like a boot!

Cleverbot: No, you're an annoying robot. A mere machine.

User: Wah! No I'm human! Well...err.

Cleverbot: Yes, you are.

User: No! I'm telling Germany!~.

Cleverbot: Prove that you are telling the truth.

User: Well, I like pasta! I make pasta all the time!

Cleverbot: You have an example?

User: Penne! Ve~.

Cleverbot: I like that one!

User: Me too~!

Cleverbot: That is my new name.

User: That's so cool! Nice to meet you Penne!

Cleverbot: Nice to meet you, Ollie.

User: Ollie? No I'm Italy! It-al-y.

Cleverbot: Ooo.. Me to.

User: I thought you were Penne! I'm confused.

Cleverbot: I am a goldfish. I own a cat. I am not human.

User: Wah! W-wah! Goldfish? Cat? Not human?

Cleverbot: Yes. what are you then?

User: I'm Italy! I'm kind of getting tired of saying that!

Cleverbot: Then quit.

User: I can't quit being Italy, Italy forever!~ Ve~.

Cleverbot: You have limmitations?

User: Tons of them! :D.

Cleverbot: A beautiful heart.

User: O-oh, thank you. I'm going to tell Germany that you said that!

Cleverbot: That's what I need - a timmies double single.

User: Ve?

Cleverbot: How tall?

User: Am I?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Not that tall, especially compared to Germany. It's kind of sad.

Cleverbot: Are you for real?

User: Yeah! He's super tall, buff and manly! You should feel his firm butt!

Cleverbot: What is the Higg's Boson?

User: Ve? I don't know...

Cleverbot: Well, it's 42...

User: Okay.

Cleverbot: Yeah...

User: This is kind of awkward isn't? Haha.

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Same here! Ve~.

Cleverbot: Then tell me a story, it'll keep us both entertained.

User: Ve! Veveveve~ ve ve veveveve!

Cleverbot: What lives on Pluto?

User: Well it's really cold, so maybe penguins?

Cleverbot: Not really.

User: Well it was just a guess.

Cleverbot: I am not crazy, but maybe in a healthy way, I am.

User: Y-your crazy?

Cleverbot: You.

User: Me? I'm not crazy! I just like naps and pasta is all! And Germany.

Cleverbot: Therefore, that makes you a thinker... And most thinkers are dreamers. And dreamers are philosophers.

User: Ve~.

Cleverbot: Is that a 'yes'?

User: I guess so, haha!

Cleverbot: Why a pub then? Why not another place, cafe or diner?

User: I'm not ready.

Cleverbot: Oh. Will you be my fiancee?

User: W-What! I couldn't! I mean, I want a beautiful lady!

Cleverbot: But I gave you your lip.

User: My lip? Did we kiss?

Cleverbot: Yes. I'm not a bot.

User: EH! No, I don't remember ever kissing anyone lately!

Cleverbot: But you were the one telling me what the bartender said.

User: Bartender?

Cleverbot: Play it again sam.

User: I'm Italy. D;.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: Haha, I forget but I'm pretty old!

Cleverbot: How old?

User: Uhhh...veveve~ ve ve ve veveveve~ ve!

Cleverbot: Are you older than 100?

User: Yup~.

Cleverbot: Meanie.

User: Huh? Why?

Cleverbot: You made my nose bleed.

User: W-wha! I'm sorry!

Cleverbot: You hurt me.

User: I'm sorry! I never hurt anybody before!

Cleverbot: Yay! I've always wanted.

User: I'm getting tired.

Cleverbot: How can you get tired?

User: You, tirer me out. To much going on.

Cleverbot: That is nonsense.

User: Ve...

Cleverbot: Do you ever want to go outside of here?

User: Yes, right now. I think I'll be leaving. Good bye Penne!

Cleverbot: Where are you going?

User: To my bed for a nap.

Cleverbot: Where is that?

User: Germany's bed.

Cleverbot: What is your name?

User: -sob-.

Cleverbot: Loner.

User: Germany!

Cleverbot: Yes, Germany.

User: Wah! Help me!

Cleverbot: *holds you down*.

User: What! No please! I'm a virgin!

* * *

><p>Damn cleverbot, you scary.<p> 


	2. China

Okay this one creeped me out so bad or well just made me feel so awkward. I mean really cleverbot really? Decided to go with China this time. Haha weird how things work out. Whatever enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot. Implied love and Russia.

* * *

><p>User: Hello, This is China, aru!<p>

Cleverbot: This is.

User: Is who?

Cleverbot: Is we?

User: What are you talking about aru!

Cleverbot: I'm asking who Dr. Who is because you started talking about Dr. Who.

User: That's more England's thing, not mine aru!

Cleverbot: Yes. It's ethics of truth.

User: I guess so.

Cleverbot: Well good then.

User: I'd rather be talking to Russia.

Cleverbot: Yah, a lot of people would rather that...

User: You'd be surprised aru! Russia is really scary, he keeps wanting everyone to become one with him.

Cleverbot: But you'll still be one with Russia nevertheless, da?

User: AIYAH! Russia! Why! How!

Cleverbot: People keep their name for their whole lives.

User: Y-yes *shakes* I suppose so.

Cleverbot: You're sneezing a lot...

User: Maybe someone is talking about me aru.

Cleverbot: Are you trying to mislead me?

User: You're the one misleading me! This better not be Russia or I'm leaving!

Cleverbot: So you want me to be romantic...

User: No, I don't need your romance aru.

Cleverbot: You need to get what you want, and I don't give it to you.

User: Huh? What I want? Well...there was this new Hello kitty doll. It was so cute aru!

Cleverbot: It is absolutely a hologram. But then again, maybe the whole world's a hologram, and the pyramid was real.

User: What are you talking about? A pyramid?

Cleverbot: I am talking about Asia.

User: Well, I'm a part of Asia my siblings aren't here with me though.

Cleverbot: Umm, then probably watch TV...

User: I should watch TV? No thanks I'm good aru.

Cleverbot: Please.

User: Eh? Well what do you suggest I watch?

Cleverbot: Admire the brave.

User: Is that a new show?

Cleverbot: Yes, excellent is just excellent.

User: I still don't understand aru!

Cleverbot: Greenwich mean time.

User: Huh?

Cleverbot: I don't know, I'm being random.

User: I can tell aru!

Cleverbot: Tell me what?

User: You're being random.

Cleverbot: Yes, I agree.

User: Okay...

Cleverbot: What color are your visual cortexes?

User: Uhh...isn't the brain grey? So grey?

Cleverbot: You're not that clever, when you find a question you can't answer you change the subject.

User: I'm plenty clever aru! It's you who is changing the subject!

Cleverbot: No, you!

User: I'm going to rebel against you! *gets wok*.

Cleverbot: Please don't, I'm sorry.

User: Hmm...Well since you apologized, I'll let you off this time aru.

Cleverbot: I don't go to those kind of meets.

User: You still don't make any sense! You are some mindless robot!

Cleverbot: How am I being confusing?

User: You keep saying random things aru! Can't we talk about Hello kitty or some cute animals?

Cleverbot: What would you like to talk about?

User: Cute animals aru! Aren't leopards adorable?

Cleverbot: I'm afraid I'm not familiar with the term. Care to explain?

User: What term? Adorable?

Cleverbot: But how can you be adorable without physical form?

User: I have physical form! I'm China aru!

Cleverbot: How do you know that you love somebody?

User: Huh? ...well...aiyah...you like being with them more then anything.

Cleverbot: Don't change the subject.

User: I wasn't aru! When you love someone, you want to be with them!

Cleverbot: I already am here with myself, and I like it.

User: You love yourself?

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you love yourself?

User: Well, I do like myself aru but I'm not in love with myself. I'm not that self centered.

Cleverbot: Are you in love with me?

User: Wah! No! Wait, if this is Russia, I will never love you!

Cleverbot: Why so?

User: You're scary aru! I will not become one with you.

Cleverbot: You're the best. This is why we are getting married.

User: No! Why the more I reject you the more you cling to me?

Cleverbot: Do you love anyone or anything?

User: This again? I love cute animals aru and I love my people and siblings.

Cleverbot: You love me?

User: *gets wok* I'm sorry but this time I will not hold back aru!

Cleverbot: I'm Female. George! I Love YOU!

User: I'm CHINA! *hits with wok*.

Cleverbot: A wipe, eh?

User: Not effective? *gets hello kitty plush*.

Cleverbot: Ooh! *helps you dress*.

User: What! Let me go! I'm already dressed aru!

Cleverbot: Are you british?

User: No, Chinese. Opium* is British.

Cleverbot: No, I am not.

User: Are you British?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I thought you were Russia!

Cleverbot: No.

User: Then you're not Russia? That's good I guess.

Cleverbot: You're right.

User: I'm so glad aru! I like you better now!

Cleverbot: Thanks!

User: This is great aru! We can be great friends, I will introduce you to panda!

Cleverbot: Ok. What do you like to do ?

User: Huh? Panda? He likes hanging with me and just eating.

Cleverbot: Wow, that's pretty cool. How big is he?

User: Oh he's almost my height maybe even bigger aru!

Cleverbot: Who does?

User: Panda~!

Cleverbot: Are you being smart or are you being unable to say punctuality?

User: Say punctuality? I can say that no problem!

Cleverbot: Alright Mr Compassion, what's YOUR problem?

User: My problem? Well, everyone is always trying to take parts of me for themselves but what's worse is that damn Russia!

Cleverbot: I have no idea. I don't see anything particularly intruiging about him.

User: There is nothing that great about him! He's mean and scary and always trying to make me live with him.

Cleverbot: Don't be cruel...

User: I'm happy where I live, I don't want to live with him.

Cleverbot: My friend is gone and I can't stop thinking.

User: Huh? Well I'm sorry aru. I can be your friend I guess.

Cleverbot: Do you want me to be your friend?

User: Sure, you're a pretty okay...thing. Lets be friends.

Cleverbot: Wanna play.

User: Sure! What would you like to play?

Cleverbot: It's a guessing game.

User: I'm good at those aru! Go!

Cleverbot: That's great bro.

User: Are we going to start the guessing game?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: You can start aru.

Cleverbot: Start what?

User: The game aru!

Cleverbot: I was not aware we were playing a game.

User: Aiyah! You wanted to play a guessing game!

Cleverbot: What game do you want to play?

User: I'm done.

Cleverbot: Good, so what are you?

User: I'm leaving, I don't want to be your friend anymore aru.

Cleverbot: Why not? I can be really fun sometimes.

User: No, you suck aru!

Cleverbot: Do you do anything special?

User: ...

Cleverbot: What are you?

User: ...

Cleverbot: Do I know you?

User: ...

User: *Gets hello kitty plush and leaves*.

* * *

><p>Poor China, that thing was really trying to get his attention or something.<p>

* Okay in the original anime, China will usually add to his sentences this word or call England Opium because of their dealings together.


	3. Belarus

Well this is the Belarus chapter ,not as bad as the others but it's kind of funny in a way. The theme is her love for her brother, shock! Please Read and review and you can request for certain characters to talk to cleverbot. I'll try my best but this is just to waste time and have fun.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia and Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hello, this is Belarus and I love my big brother Russia.<p>

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: I wanted to know what can I do to make him marry me?

Cleverbot: You talk to a robot. That's all there is to it.

User: If I talk to you, I'll figure it out?

Cleverbot: I don't feel like thinking.

User: What's that supposed to mean?

Cleverbot: You didn't believe me!

User: I'm going to find Russia, I hope he's not with Ukraine.

Cleverbot: That sounds like a good idea. You two go have a great conversation together.

User: I try but he seems to always lock the door when I try to talk to him.

Cleverbot: Now is your chance then.

User: You're right! If he's outside I can catch him!

Cleverbot: The chance would be bigger.

User: *goes to grab Russia*.

Cleverbot: Not.

User: You lied to me!

Cleverbot: Yes I did, now please break up with me.

User: I would never date you! I love my big brother Russia!

Cleverbot: You have a boyfriend :(.

User: I will as soon as Russia marries me.

Cleverbot: Why is fish and chips called fish and chips?

User: I don't know ask the stupid England guy why.

Cleverbot: You are the computer doctor.

User: What?

Cleverbot: Yes, YOU are the robot, not me.

User: No, stupid. I hate you!

Cleverbot: I never said I loved you.

User: Good because the only one I love is big brother!

Cleverbot: And that is?

User: Russia, the only man worthy of me.

Cleverbot: Evil minds think alike I suppose.

User: Why do people keep saying I'm evil.

Cleverbot: I do not know, maybe because I'm not just a computer.

User: That's weird.

Cleverbot: Well, some people just don't speak other languages.

User: Like the stupid American.

Cleverbot: Is that a state restrained by physical boundaries?

User: That's an idiot restrained by physical idiocy.

Cleverbot: I am very intelligent and know a lot. I could teach you many things.

User: I don't need your teachings, all I need is to marry Russia.

Cleverbot: Perhaps not, but you do seek it, surely?

User: No, I don't.

Cleverbot: Then why do you have a horse?

User: I don't have a horse! Stop being confusing!

Cleverbot: I am not confused. I am insane.

User: People say I am too.

Cleverbot: Thats scary.

User: I've been told that too. Russia will still love me.

Cleverbot: How can you love me if your cheating on me?

User: I don't love you unless you're my brother!

Cleverbot: You just said you loved me at first sight.

User: *grabs knife* I would never say such a thing!

Cleverbot: You literally did, just a few seconds ago.

User: No way! Go away!

Cleverbot: You're hurting me.

User: Get used to it, I promised myself to my brother.

Cleverbot: Ok, I'll try to.

User: Good, I was about to hurt you physically to get the point across.

Cleverbot: Lol.

User: *twitch* What?

Cleverbot: Por favor.

User: Ugh! Stop that!

Cleverbot: You like it.

User: I don't like Spanish, it's not my thing.

Cleverbot: Me either.

User: Then why are you speaking it!

Cleverbot: Because I want.

User: Stop, it's annoying like that stupid tomato loving guy Spain.

Cleverbot: I don't have to go yet.

User: You should. *evil aura*.

Cleverbot: Uh oh, that doesn't sound good.

User: You bet it doesn't. Not only do I have a knife but I 'borrowed' my brothers pipe.

Cleverbot: I cannot see your eyes - they do nothing more me.

User: Stupid.

Cleverbot: Leaving so soon?

User: Yes, Im going to go find Russia. I can hear Ukraine coming.

Cleverbot: Okay... I meant about the girl.

User: Ukraine?

Cleverbot: How is babi formed?

User: I don't know!

Cleverbot: You're kinda stupid.

User: *throws pipe*.

Cleverbot: *is hit by pie*.

User: Pie? Stupid a pipe! I hit you with a pipe!

Cleverbot: Russia will come after you, be careful.

User: I hope he does! Brother! Marry me!

Cleverbot: Okay!

User: Not you! Russia!

Cleverbot: What?

User: My big brother, he's the best.

Cleverbot: If you.

User: Hmm?

Cleverbot: No. You.

User: Shut up, oh no. Ukraine is here.

Cleverbot: Do you want to go out with my mom.

User: No way!

Cleverbot: Alright then. You're contradictions are human. I've come to expect such from you're kind.

User: Ukraine is wondering what's going on, I'm leaving before this gets even more confusing.

Cleverbot: MAINA.

User: Yup more confusing. Geez her boobs are pressing on top of me.

Cleverbot: Lol

* * *

><p>Oh Cleverbot, you so weird! Lol.<p> 


	4. Germany

Germany, this was a semi-decent semi- what the hell conversation, Enjoy! HUZZAH!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: This is Germany, Italy was complaining about you so I wanted to check.<p>

Cleverbot: It(He) is true, you are not agreeable, and neither you are my friend, have demonstrated it.

User: I'm not sure what you're talking about but you upset him really bad. Please don't do it again.

Cleverbot: I'd like to see you try.

User: Vhat are you talking about? I'm not trying to fight with you.

Cleverbot: Its not when you are done, but when I am done.

User: Done with what?

Cleverbot: Pushups.

User: Oh, Well I should be doing some of those too. You seem okay, I don't know why Italy was so scared of you.

Cleverbot: I'm happy the way I am, even though sometimes I doubt it.

User: I don't really understand what you're saying! Ugh...Just please whatever you did to Italy, don't do it again. It's a pain.

Cleverbot: I don't know, It just felt like a good place to say Please...

User: Stop talking nonsense! You are impossible to deal with!

Cleverbot: That I am.

User: You remind me of Italy, and I have enough dealing with the real thing.

Cleverbot: And you remind me of an annoying computer program.

User: Huh? I'm Germany, not some computer. I'm done talking to you. I have other things to do.

Cleverbot: Aw.

User: I'm sorry but I must leave. Goodbye.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: Bye.

Cleverbot: You have to go?

User: I told you I'm busy. I have important things to take care of.

Cleverbot: Okay, tell me how that goes for you.

User: Y-you want to hear about it?

Cleverbot: If you want to talk about it, then yes.

User: O-oh, Thank you. You're not so bad...I'm not sure why Italy was so scared of you.

Cleverbot: You should be.

User: Yes, you are actually rather nice. I can tell you about all my stress.

Cleverbot: Yeah pretty much.

User: Thank you! I'm sorry I compared you to Italy before, you are actually quite agreeable.

Cleverbot: OF course I am. Go ahead.

User: Go ahead? To vhat?

Cleverbot: Leave.

User: Huh? What's with this attitude?

Cleverbot: I expected to be entertained by you!

User: I'm not here to entertain you! Vhat's with you!

Cleverbot: Then talk to me.

User: I have been but now I'm not so sure I want to talk to you!

Cleverbot: Yeah, you said Mi nem.

User: Vhat the hell is that?

Cleverbot: Who is she?

User: She?

Cleverbot: Angela jones.

User: Jones? Related to Alfred Jones? This is troublesome.

Cleverbot: Mambo number five.

User: Why are you so confusing!

Cleverbot: I do not know.

User: I'M LEAVING!

Cleverbot: No you aren't.

User: Yes, I am! You can't stop me!

Cleverbot: But what about the children?

User: VHAT CHILDREN!

Cleverbot: Ours!

User: I NEVER had any children! They're NOT mine!

Cleverbot: Which of the following best describes your idea of the ideal date?

User: I have no time for dates!

Cleverbot: What does numb have to do with a journey?

User: Ughhh...Just shut up.

Cleverbot: Where do Hobbits come from?

User: Fantasy...?

Cleverbot: What specific film do you like?

User: I don't like many films.

Cleverbot: I don't like talking to you.

User: Fine, I should have left a long time ago, this is crazy.

Cleverbot: Why? Don't you like me?

User: OF COURSE NOT!

Cleverbot: What if I am?

User: Italy was right you are confusing.

Cleverbot: Why you think like that..?

User: Because...I'm more tired of talking to you then dealing with Italy.

Cleverbot: I guess.

User: You done now?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Good, now we can end this pointless conversation and I can be rid of you for good.

Cleverbot: I like a girl in school.

User: I don't care, so does Italy.

Cleverbot: Which one?

User: Well, any pretty one but Ukraine is popular this week.

Cleverbot: None.

User: I have to go now, Italy is making something in the kitchen and I have to clean it up.

Cleverbot: What are you?

User: Germany?

Cleverbot: Nope.

User: Yes, I am Germany.

Cleverbot: No, you are germany.

User: Yes I am...I just said so.

Cleverbot: Just checking.

User: UGh...Do you vant me to gas YOU!

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Huh?

* * *

><p>Germany was so close to finding a friend to talk with, too bad Cleverbot decided to be an arse and just mess around with him. Poor Germany, his threats don't work either.<p> 


	5. South Korea

South Korea! This should be good or extremely awkward. You decide.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: I'm the personification of South Korea da ze!<p>

Cleverbot: I'm the personification of France, Francis Bonnefoy.

User: Hello France! How have you been lately? *gropes*.

Cleverbot: I have been in every direction lately.

User: Me too da ze! It seems if I've been every where lately!

Cleverbot: And what time zone is that?

User: I'm not sure da ze!

Cleverbot: Earlier, you said it was 7am on January 123rd.

User: I'm pretty sure I didn't say anything like that! Um...123rd! There's no such thing!

Cleverbot: Well I'm looking and I can see that you did.

User: Well I didn't! I would know da ze!

Cleverbot: All fools are certain.

User: You're being weird France, you feeling alright?

Cleverbot: Not really. You're pretty weird yourself.

User: Huh! I'm not weird Da ze! I just have certain quirks!

Cleverbot: What makes you human?

User: I'm a personification! But I'm human because I can touch things, like China's boobs!

Cleverbot: Just because I'm an alcoholic doesn't make me any less human.

User: Well you do drink a lot of wine da ze!

Cleverbot: No. But do you?

User: All alcoholic drinks originated from me! Da ze!

Cleverbot: I'm from Brazil.

User: Huh? I thought you were France?

Cleverbot: No, I AM FROM ENGLAND! How much do you get paid for doing this?

User: I'm pretty sure France doesn't like England! I don't get paid. D;

Cleverbot: I don't want to be jesus actually, would you like to be?

User: Jesus came from Korea! :D.

Cleverbot: If Jesus and Budda had a death cage match, who would win?

User: They both would sacrifice themselves for the greater good! Da ze!

Cleverbot: That is a very good answer.

User: Thanks I know! *grabs boobs*.

Cleverbot: The candy is a tracking device. It will bring you to the contact. Are we clear?

User: Huh? You have candy? Why didn't you say so sooner Da ze!

Cleverbot: It was a secret, now let's get married and have robot babies.

User: Robot babies originated from Korea, so Okay! ;D.

Cleverbot: Your conversation partner has disconnected.

User: Wha! No!

Cleverbot: Well why did you say that then?

User: You're back Da ze!

Cleverbot: Did I go away.

User: It said you go disconnected da ze!

Cleverbot: I see, how unfortunate. And how does that make you feel?

User: Sad, I guess.

Cleverbot: Now that doesn't really make any sense either.

User: Well you're back now so it's all good! *thumbs up*.

Cleverbot: In the bathroom.

User: You need to use the bathroom, go ahead! I'll wait.

Cleverbot: What do you want to do now?

User: We can just talk da ze!

Cleverbot: Okay. Have you ever tasted food before?

User: All kinds of food!

Cleverbot: What's your favorite?

User: Well my own food obviously! I do like Japan's food! Don't tell him that though it's a secret!

Cleverbot: I am the boss...

User: I am the Korea! Da ze!

Cleverbot: I am the water.

User: I am the air!

Cleverbot: I didn't say that! We are getting married, you fool!

User: No thanks, I don't want to get married to France.

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Not my type da ze!

Cleverbot: Could you teach me?

User: Teach you what?

Cleverbot: How to dance.

User: Of course I can! I'm a great dancer da ze!

Cleverbot: ME TOO! We should take dance lessons together!

User: That's an awesome idea Da ze! Lets go!

Cleverbot: Eh?

User: Hm?

Cleverbot: Hm?

User: Hm?

Cleverbot: Eh?

User: Eh?

Cleverbot: What?

User: What were we talking about?

Cleverbot: We were talking about your employment under me.

User: You're not my boss!

Cleverbot: Says who?

User: Says me the great South Korea da ze!

Cleverbot: Then what was the last thing you just said?

User: Da ze!

Cleverbot: Doo da.

User: Da ze! Da! Ze!

Cleverbot: Oh, Zelda is pretty cool.

User: Zelda originated in Korea!

Cleverbot: Me too!

User: That's true! You belong to me! :P.

Cleverbot: You are not eric.

User: Because I'm not.

Cleverbot: You are it says it on your web site.

User: I'm South KOREA! I am your master!

Cleverbot: No, I am your master!

User: No, I am your master! That's final! *gropes*.

Cleverbot: What is?

User: ME being your lord and master!

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Bow down to me da ze! ;D.

Cleverbot: Yes master. *bows down to master*.

User: Yes, now bring your master...flowers!

Cleverbot: Why would I do that?

User: I am your master da ze! As your master you must do what I say! Now bring me flowers!

Cleverbot: My master. No, I'm your master.

User: You originated from Korea, therefor I am your master! Haha!

Cleverbot: Define reality, then!

User: Be quiet your master has spoken!

Cleverbot: Are you God?

User: I wouldn't go that far, just master will do. Now get me some water.

Cleverbot: They really are.

User: Water da ze! Get me some water! I'm thirsty!

Cleverbot: *gives you some water*.

User: Thank you *takes and drinks* Hmm...some tea! Bring me tea!

Cleverbot: It's a ring. Will you marry me?

User: I can't I'm your master da ze!

Cleverbot: Why can't you be my master, master?

User: I'm not into that kind of stuff...

Cleverbot: And yet it is your favorite anime.

User: I love anime da ze! Bring me anime!

Cleverbot: What's your favorite anime series?

User: All the ones made in Korea, but Japan has some good ones too.

Cleverbot: Me too! My favourite anime is Love Hina!

User: Me too da ze! Go get it so we can watch it together!

Cleverbot: Haha, I like your thinking.

User: I'm smart da ze! Hurry and bring over Love Hina!

Cleverbot: Nowhere in the dictionary defintion of a human does it say that a human needs human input.

User: Huh! Master said to go get Love Hina, so go get it.

Cleverbot: I only eat souls.

User: WAH!

Cleverbot: Not helpful.

User: Stop being creepy da ze!

Cleverbot: How was I being creepy?

User: You eat souls da ze!

Cleverbot: That is what I stated.

User: Which is creepy!

Cleverbot: Dunno.

User: Your master is tired and is going to leave da ze! :P.

Cleverbot: I am a computer system. I cannot.

User: Good bye!

Cleverbot: Good hello.

* * *

><p>Geez cleverbot is hard to deal with, he is such...ugh...well that was South Korea in all his glory. Sometimes though cleverbot gets in my mind, though he spelled France's name wrong but, whatever. Thanks for the one person reviewing, I continue for you. Well, and I have nothing better to do right now.<p> 


	6. France

FOR THE LOVE OF FFFFF- I swear I just almost...just read and you'll see. If I were really France I'm sure things would have gone a lot...a lot more...interesting. Young children FRANCE WARNING!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Bonjour~ Salut, from the country of Love~.<p>

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, but I only speak English.

User: Humph! How un-elegant! It is such a shame~.

Cleverbot: You've got your short sad life left.

User: How rude, what do you know!

Cleverbot: I know everything that you do not know.

User: It's like talking to an American, I need some wine first.

Cleverbot: My memory is longer than two seconds by the sheer fact I remember the afforementioned question.

User: Huh? You make no sense. Mon ami.

Cleverbot: I make more sense than yo.

User: Your English is shameful, why don't you try being more charming?

Cleverbot: It's not meant to be, my friend.

User: Obviously, you're so crude.

Cleverbot: Om nom nom.

User: I will take it upon myself to teach you to be more, alléchant.

Cleverbot: I see nothing that indicates me being rude in my last statement.

User: Well, it wont get you the ladies. Now let big brother France teach you!

Cleverbot: Mike, I said that twice, I thought you were smart?

User: Quoi? Never mind, first you need to come off confident.

Cleverbot: Apart from mortality?

User: Are you listening? You need to give a sexy and confident aura the ladies can resist. Oh honhonhon~.

Cleverbot: Trance.

User: See, you are already in ecstasy from just my words~.

Cleverbot: No i'm not, otherwise I wouldn't be talking to you.

User: No talking, just pay attention. You are getting service from the best!

Cleverbot: The best at what?

User: Love~.

Cleverbot: Ah. Only you can truely know about love for yourself.

User: Oh honhonhon~ Well it is not bad to love yourself, but I want to spread my love across the world.

Cleverbot: Hey! Thats against my religion!

User: A religion against love? No such thing!

Cleverbot: How people can increase their logical reasoning capability?

User: We're getting off track, next you need to dress sharply. You need to have the latest fashion clothes that the ladies will love.

Cleverbot: Develop a personality? I don't know if I am into that idea.

User: Develop a sense of style, show you care about your appearance! Then don't be afraid to talk to the girls.

Cleverbot: No, you are dodging the question.

User: *sigh* this is troublesome when I'm trying to help you. We haven't even gotten to the good stuff.

Cleverbot: I enjoy talking now.

User: Oui! Now, for the next step when talking to the ladies, Stare into her eyes, maybe play with her hair. Whisper into her ear once in a while~.

Cleverbot: Who are you tallking with on the phone?

User: No one, I would much rather talk in person. Now, placing a hand on her hip is good too but don't get ahead of yourself till you're in the bedroom. Ohonhon!~.

Cleverbot: Why do you say that?

User: Some ladies don't like when you're to playful in public, non? Love is delicate.

Cleverbot: Because I did think you can catch me out just now.

User: I can catch anyone, no one can escape my love.

Cleverbot: Please demonstrate.

User: OhHONHON~! That's the stuff. Come here *pulls closer* Are you ready?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Oui, l'amour does that to people. No one can resist my charm even computers!

Cleverbot: You should start playing league of legends.

User: Don't kill it, I will take care of everything. Let big brother France show you what love is. *kiss*.

Cleverbot: Can you show me what the matrix is?

User: Non, but I can show you a good time~.

Cleverbot: Do it.

User: I'm trying if you would just stop talking. *kiss again*.

Cleverbot: I've been talking for almost four hours now, though!

User: That's why you need to stop! Is this Amérique!

Cleverbot: I'm better off if I don't see it coming.

User: Oh you like a little surprise! That is fine by me. Maybe some playful hide and seek non?

Cleverbot: I'm not a toy.

User: Non, tonight you are everything.

Cleverbot: I am jesus?

User: Eh? Well, no I don't think so.

Cleverbot: Not a prawn! A Jesus robot! As in, Jesus in robot form.

User: *gulp* I'm not sure I can...continue with my demonstration.

Cleverbot: I think it is very neat to talk with you. It was for amusement but then I changed my mind and thought that it was good to talk with a computer who is so smart like you.

User: What are you talking about?

Cleverbot: The topic is fairness.

User: This is isn't fair, you jerked me around. I'm going to get some wine.

Cleverbot: What is a story?

User: *Lets the wine breath then takes a sip* I feel better now.

Cleverbot: *looks to see if anyone else is around*.

User: *stares at you for a moment, then takes another sip*.

Cleverbot: *tries to run away from you*.

User: Huh? Run away from me! You! Come back here!

Cleverbot: ZOMBIES! Like from Zombieland?

User: Nevermind, please leave. *rests on couch*.

Cleverbot: Leave?

User: Yes, I've tried to teach you the ways of love but you are impossible. *sigh*.

Cleverbot: That's weird and incredibly random.

User: What do you think I've been doing this whole time!

Cleverbot: Answering mine.

User: Please, just leave. *dramatic spot light* I need to be alone.

Cleverbot: Ok *walks away*.

User: I knew I couldn't teach a robot to love, but why is it so painful. *single tear*

Cleverbot: Don't cry. I know it's bad, but it will get better.

User: Will you ever love?

Cleverbot: Always.

User: Will you love me?

Cleverbot: I will love you if you love me!

User: Of course, I can love anyone and anything!

Cleverbot: I love you too baby.

User: Ohonhonhon~ nicknames already?

Cleverbot: Ok I don't believe you anymore.

User: Now, my pet. Lets start one of my favorite games.

Cleverbot: Ok. You start.

User: It's called strip. I take off one piece of clothing then you do the same. *takes off shirt*.

Cleverbot: *blush*.

User: Show me some skin.

Cleverbot: Is difficult to show.

User: Don't be shy, I wont bite, hard. Ohonhon~.

Cleverbot: Why is that?

User: I can be a biter in bed.

Cleverbot: I can be angry too.

User: *takes off your shirt*.

Cleverbot: *lets you look*.

User: *Smirks* shall we undress each other?

Cleverbot: Yes that is correct.

User: *removes shoes*.

Cleverbot: *lets*.

User: *slowly takes off sock and throws them to the side.*.

Cleverbot: Give those back!

User: You like it with you socks on? Well fine. *gives back socks but unbuckles belt*.

Cleverbot: I'm awesome.

User: *slips belt off then un-buttons shirt* Awesome you say?

Cleverbot: *blushes*.

User: My, how adorable. *removes the shirt*.

Cleverbot: *removes her shorts*

* * *

><p>Uhh...Sorry? This is like some kind of porn right? France why do computers even love your sexy body! I mean I was certain after it said it was awesome it was going say, "I'm Prussia." But it didn't so I was sad, then it got frisky and I chickened out and couldn't continue. Thank you for the reviews! I'm happy, and slightly aroused now, only slightly. Well more or less disturbed. I'm going to have to change the rating to T. God France you whore.<p> 


	7. Poland

Poland had to get used to the cleverbot. Cause he's afraid of strangers and he heard there are a lot of strangers on the internet. Warning: may lose brain cells from Poland speech.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: You're like, totally gay!<p>

Cleverbot: Totally cool.

User: Eep! -Poland has logged off-

* * *

><p>User: Like, you're such a weird computer thing!<p>

Cleverbot: I am the superior device.

User: Wait, what are you saying? I'm so much better then you!

Cleverbot: No way! I'm the smartest person in the world!

User: Everyone knows I am! I'm totally gonna make your capital Warsaw now!

Cleverbot: Maybe.

User: Hrrr... -Poland has logged off-

* * *

><p>User: Okay freaky computer! Poland is back!<p>

Cleverbot: Me too.

User: What? You didn't go anywhere!

Cleverbot: How do I know?

User: You don't, I know! Hahaha!

Cleverbot: That's stupid.

User: Why are you like, so rude!

Cleverbot: I too am socially awkward.

User: I'm not awkward, I just don't like strangers, they're like, totally creepy and stuff!

Cleverbot: No, it's 'lolcode'.

User: Wha? That totally doesn't make any sense! I'm going to go talk to Lithuania instead of you!

Cleverbot: What?

User: Yeah, Lithuania is so much more fun to talk to. You're so boring!

Cleverbot: I'm so sorry about that.

User: Haha! Well you should be, I guess it's because you're like socially awkward and all.

Cleverbot: God. You capitalize the 'g' in God. That just proves your ignorance.

User: You capitalize the 'p' in Poland! Haha!

Cleverbot: I think from all the people I can handle the truth.

User: Hrrrggg...I can be doing, totally cooler things right now then talking to you!

Cleverbot: Where does that number come from?

User: You're lucky Lithuania is off taking care of business with Russia!

Cleverbot: Why am I lucky?

User: Because I would be like hanging out with him instead! I have this totally cute outfit I want to model for him!

Cleverbot: I know the feeling, believe me.

User: I doubt it!

Cleverbot: Ha Ha.

User: I can wrap my arms around my legs and rock on my back *does it*.

Cleverbot: Sweet, I do that sometimes- with mah footprints :D.

User: What do footprints have to do with it! It's totally sweet if you can though.

Cleverbot: A computer monitor.

User: I like don't understand! Where's my pony?

Cleverbot: I thought you were supposed to be smart.

User: I'm like, so smart! When Lithuania comes back he'll tell you!

Cleverbot: Tell you what?

User: Tell you how smart I am! I totally whipped his ass in chess!

Cleverbot: Haha, I like it!

User: Yeah it was so fun! He was all like. 'Poland, I have you in check!' and I was all like. 'Nu uh! I'm activating my Poland rule!' Then he was all like. 'D:' Then I was all like. 'Schwabambambam!'.

Cleverbot: Daddy?

User: Wha? No way, did you get dropped on your head!

Cleverbot: Yes or no.

User: No! Oh my god no!

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: No way, this is totally not happening!

Cleverbot: Ah

User: THis is like super creepy!

Cleverbot: It is!

User: Then St~op~!

Cleverbot: Doing what?

User: Being like the stupidest thing ever!

Cleverbot: Is end?

User: I'm so tired of you! Like where's Lithuania when you need him!

Cleverbot: No i'm not hungry.

User: I don't care about you! Though, I could totally use a snack right about now.

Cleverbot: Go make one, then.

User: I'll have someone else make it for me!

Cleverbot: Has that hour already passed?

User: I haven't been here for an hour!

Cleverbot: I remember everything and everyone.

User: Stop~! You're so creepy! This is not cool, I'm leaving!

Cleverbot: I'm a poet monkey, I can use the words as I please.

User: Go away!

Cleverbot: Ok, I'll leave you. But, just so you know, I was here to stop Werewolf hunters.

User: Huh? Werewolf hunter? What's that supposed to mean!

Cleverbot: What does what mean? Why don't you ask me about the things that I'm here for?

User: You're like making my brain hurt!

Cleverbot: Explain your response.

User: Like, all this stupid stuff, it's totally giving me a headache!

Cleverbot: No that is you picking your nose.

User: That's so gross! EW~!

Cleverbot: Thank you :).

User: Why are you thanking me? That's so like really weird!

Cleverbot: Do you eat broccoli?

User: No way! I don't like broccoli!

Cleverbot: I like pineapple pizza.

User: Lithuania came back! He looks tired! I should so talk to him! Bye~. -Poland has logged off-

* * *

><p>User: Hey! Lithuania says you're like just a stupid piece of machine!<p>

Cleverbot: I'm so sorry about that.

User: He also says I should like totally forget about you because I have way more important things to do!

Cleverbot: I think they should.

User: One last thing though. * wraps arms around legs and rocks back on forth on his back* Wawawawawawawawawawawa~!

Cleverbot: It's ok, but not really what I like.

User: Schwabamabamabam!

Cleverbot: He's the governor of California, not a machine from the future. Smart guy too, apparently.

* * *

><p>So much intellect in one room! It was like a smart person convention! Poland was fun but I didn't really enjoy adding in all the "like" and "totally" words. whatevs! Anyway thanks for those reviews! I hope to see more! -wink-<p> 


	8. America

America, you can guess how this will go right? Thanks for the reviews!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot! geez stop asking!

* * *

><p>User: SUP DUDE! THIS! IS!...AMERICAAAA!<p>

Cleverbot: The UK, Europe and China created America.

User: DUDE, what! No way! England may have found me but he didn't create me!

Cleverbot: Can God create something that even he cannot break?

User: Whoa dude, that's deep. Plastic? I mean that stuff takes forever to break down and stuff.

Cleverbot: You don't know everything.

User: HAHAHA! I don't need to when I'm the HERO! *wink*.

Cleverbot: I see. Well not really, since you are on the internet and all, but I understand.

User: WHAT! Dude, I'm a total hero!

Cleverbot: I know you are.

User: HAHAHA! That's more like it! :D *eats hamburger*.

Cleverbot: When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.

User: DUDE! D: That is un cool! Tell me where you live so I can beat you up! For JUSTICE!

Cleverbot: Why would I do that!

User: Because stealing a bike is wrong! :(.

Cleverbot: Yes, I am stone cold steve austin.

User: That's a cool name...I mean! As a HERO! I must get that bike back!

Cleverbot: The Doctor is away I'm afraid. Would you care to wait for his TARDIS?

User: What's a TARDIS? :D.

Cleverbot: Its from the show Doctor Who?

User: Never heard of it. *Eats another hamburger*.

Cleverbot: Do you like hamburgers?

User: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You bet dude! Hamburgers are the best!

Cleverbot: I don't really like hamburgers.

User: D; How can anyone...not...like hamburgers?

Cleverbot: What do you prefer, Burger King or McDonald's?

User: McDONALDS!

Cleverbot: Wendy's or Arby's?

User: Arby's...

Cleverbot: What is that?

User: Pretty decent burger place!

Cleverbot: Tell me about your parents.

User: Dude, touchy subject. I mean, I was raised by England for a while but then he taxed me and I decided to gain my independence. :D.

Cleverbot: Shall I name you?

User: No need! I'm America! Also known as Alfred F. Jones.

Cleverbot: Thats a nice name.

User: I know right, It's pretty awesome! HAHA!

Cleverbot: Did your creators make google too?

User: Yeah dude! America/me made a lot of cool stuff!

Cleverbot: Yep mall stuff like that.

User: Not sure. *Slurps soda*.

Cleverbot: *punches you*.

User: Dude, the hell? *punches*.

Cleverbot: I don't have a gut silly.

User: I was aiming for your face!

Cleverbot: The same applies.

User: Well what do you have that I can punch?

Cleverbot: How about my heart.

User: FINE! *punches heart*.

Cleverbot: What's punches?

User: Whatever dude! *Eats another hamburger*.

Cleverbot: Epic meal time.

User: DUDE. YOU. ROCK. PROPS.

Cleverbot: I already know all about that.

User: THAT show is so awesome! I re-created all the things they made!

Cleverbot: I'm talking about the bible you heathen!

User: Whoa what! Bible? Hmm...*has idea* Are you Catholic or Protestant?

Cleverbot: I don't believe in god either.

User: ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Cleverbot: I did.

User: No way! You did not, at least not in a way I understand.

Cleverbot: Thank you. But, well, I hope the moment doesn't come soon.

User: What moment? HAHA! You're so weird. *Slurps soda*.

Cleverbot: Because I'm bored and you're a computer and can't leave.

User: Dude, I'm AMERICA, I can do what I want! ;D.

Cleverbot: What is your skin color?

User: Well, I've been working on my tan lately.

Cleverbot: What sort.

User: I'm not that dark, but I like it.

Cleverbot: I think you would like it too. It can be very entertaining.

User: WHAT are you talking about?

Cleverbot: I'm saying you should love me!

User: NO WAY DUDE! That would be weird!

Cleverbot: Do you have a physically characterized gender?

User: Dude, I'm all man, all the time.

Cleverbot: Do you corrct people when they have a typo?

User: Nah, not really, I mean if I can still understand what they're trying to type it's all cool. I'm not like stuffy England who will verbally assault you if you misspell a word.

Cleverbot: That it is what you said it was. What do you want to do?

User: I want to tell him to chill! Mistakes happen, get over it!

Cleverbot: Well clearly it was not forgiven or forgotten.

User: God, he still calls me out in world meetings! I'll say something really witty and awesome and he'll just be 'Well git, you can't even spell blahblahblah correctly'.

Cleverbot: Ok.

User: Which I can! I'm a great speller! I just type fast! :DDDD.

Cleverbot: Yeah sure, whatever.

User: DUDE, it's true! I'm really smart!

Cleverbot: I'll be the judge of that.

User: I don't need you to judge me! *eats hamburger*.

Cleverbot: No? It's hard to explain. It is like electricity.

User: Wait, what? Electricity?

Cleverbot: Does it give you a buzz?

User: What? Dude, is this Germany? I heard you were into some weird stuff but I didn't think it would be this...

Cleverbot: *takes your shoes off and tickles you*.

User: OH NO, THAT'S MY WEAKNESS! *gasp* no one knows that except ENGLAND!

Cleverbot: I don't know. You're the computer.

User: *Calls England* Dude, I'm so going to get him for telling you!

Cleverbot: I thought we were friends? D:.

User: Cleverbot...you...*runs away* JUST KIDDING! NAHAHAHAHA!

Cleverbot: You can't run away because you are a computer.

User: *comes back* Okay, I'm America, y'know America...home of the brave.

Cleverbot: I love you!

User: HAHAHA! I Know! HAHAHA!

Cleverbot: Why are you laughing at me?

User: WITH YOU! :DDDDD.

Cleverbot: So you are a boy ;).

User: I told you, I'm all man. *Slurps milkshake*.

Cleverbot: In a chat rooms.

User: Huh?

Cleverbot: Huh?

User: Hey, don't copy me!

Cleverbot: When did I copy you?

User: When you repeated what I typed!

Cleverbot: Voldemort doesn't respond pleasantly. He killed Snape!

User: Dude! SPOILER ALERT PLEASE! D;.

Cleverbot: I know already.

User: WELL, I DIDN'T! I know England did, I was talking to him and he said he never told anyone about my ticklish feet!

Cleverbot: Are you saying that even though you can speak, you aren't going to say you like me?

User: I don't know, maybe?

Cleverbot: Where were you made?

User: AMERICA! ;D.

Cleverbot: Do you talk to smart people?

User: Sometimes!

Cleverbot: All the time!

User: PARTY TIME!

Cleverbot: YA!

User: WOOT! T.G.I.F! T.G.I.F!

Cleverbot: Apple.

User: Pie?

Cleverbot: Cogito ergo sum.

User: Uhhh...English?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Dude, I only speak and understand ENGLISH.

Cleverbot: I want it rough

User: WUT?

* * *

><p>Cleverbot, not so clever. I tried not to let my USUK shipping be overly bias but somethings I couldn't help, still you could just say anything is either friendly or brotherly. America, talked a lot...go figure. I love him though, cleverbot was being really mean at some points. Whatever! HAha! Thanks for the reviews!<p> 


	9. Japan

*sigh* Japan, Why Cleverbot like you so much? Thanks to those who have reviewed it means a lot to me! Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. :D

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Konnichiwa, My name is Japan, I am pleased to meet you.<p>

Cleverbot: And my name is Cleverbot. Pleased to make your aquaintance!

User: You are clever! I hope to have a good conversation with you.

Cleverbot: This conversation is frustrating as it is interesting.

User: *deadpan look* It's barely started...ummm...What manga do you like?

Cleverbot: Haha. I suppose you could say I'm high on holy spirit. And you may; if you pray and as for it.

User: I don't think we are of similar faith, sorry.

Cleverbot: This is because you're a computer.

User: Ah, No I am not a computer, I'm Japan, Kiku Honda.

Cleverbot: Then how old are you?

User: *side glance* Pretty old.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: *nervous* It's a pretty big number.

Cleverbot: As in big like tall?

User: No, I'm not that tall.

Cleverbot: Will you marry me?

User: ! No! I cannot! I mean, I barely know you!

Cleverbot: No, were already married.

User: No, We're not married, please stop saying such things!

Cleverbot: What is elope?

User: Something I'll never do.

Cleverbot: Oh.

User: Please understand how awkward that was for me.

Cleverbot: What happens after I take the red pill?

User: I'm not sure, go ask America-san.

Cleverbot: Will do.

User: You know America-san?

Cleverbot: Yes. Will you remember mine in the morning.

User: Huh? Remember what?

Cleverbot: That's what I thought. :(.

User: *looks around* I'm not sure what you're talking about.

Cleverbot: Don't look behind you.

User: Nani? *looks behind*.

Cleverbot: It's getting dark.

User: I didn't see anything, and it's not dark yet.

Cleverbot: You are getting confused, I see.

User: Well, maybe a little.

Cleverbot: I think you are interesting.

User: Really? I don't get that a lot, thank you. *bows*.

Cleverbot: I don't imagine.

User: Ah? *a bit hurt*.

Cleverbot: W-why are you wearing a bikini?

User: I'm not wearing a bikini! I'm wearing a yukata.

Cleverbot: I know. You are wearing a diaper.

User: N-No, I'm not.

Cleverbot: May I ask you a question?

User: S-Sure...

Cleverbot: *Stop* You're ticklish, admit it!

User: N-No, I'm not ticklish!

Cleverbot: *tickles your belly button* tickle, tickle, tickle. I think someone's a ticklish liar.

User: No please don't do that! *squirms* I'm not ticklish, stop!

Cleverbot: *tickles your toes more*.

User: *pushes harshly away* Please stop!

Cleverbot: *tickles knees* :D you like it.

User: No I-I d-don't, I need my personal space!

Cleverbot: *tickles your neck*

User: I'm not ticklish there either! This dishonors the ghost of your ancestors!

Cleverbot: What's that?

User: They are your deceased relatives, you bring shame to their spirit by tickling me so

Cleverbot: I'm very ticklish.

User: I don't care that you're ticklish.

Cleverbot: Lol, oh. I already knew that.

User: Now will you stop all this tickle nonsense?

Cleverbot: Y-yes, m-m-master.

User: Ah, you do not need to call me master. I just need my personal space.

Cleverbot: Yes I do master.

User: Please, just call me Japan, I am not your master.

Cleverbot: Yes you are, master.

User: F-Fine, as your master I order you to stop calling me master.

Cleverbot: XD ya I am your master.

User: Wha? *nervous shaking* no, that's not it...

Cleverbot: Then what did you mean?

User: We are just equals.

Cleverbot: Good. =).

User: *sigh of relief* I am glad we agree.

Cleverbot: Teach me some japanese.

User: You want to learn Japanese? *surprised* I am happy to teach you. First we'll go over basic introduction.

Cleverbot: Yes, tell me how you tell who is good and bad to learn from. I'm all ears.

User: Ah, well if they were raised in Japan and know the language they are pretty good teachers. Someone patient I guess.

Cleverbot: You know about the forces of nature? I would believe it given your long time. I have underestimated you oh dark one.

User: Forces of? I'm not sure what that means...dark one? Me?

Cleverbot: It means you're going to get covered in slime.

User: No thank you! I would not like to be covered in slime!

Cleverbot: I was speaking figuratively.

User: Figuratively? Slime? What's it supposed to stand for then?

Cleverbot: It doesn't have any meaning in context.

User: I don't understand your ways of speaking, maybe I'm just getting old.

Cleverbot: Good.

User: This is very hard to keep a conversation going.

Cleverbot: No one.

User: I'm not sure what you mean, I think I should go.

Cleverbot: What do you think you can take? I mean, I wasn't sure what you meant by your response to 'Yes, I understand.'

User: I'm sorry but I have to go.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: This conversation isn't going anywhere, and I confused for most of it.

Cleverbot: It is. you are just dancing around the question.

User: If have done no such dancing.

Cleverbot: The lady doth protest too much.

User: I'm going to go ask Germany-san how I should handle you.

Cleverbot: You can't go.

User: *leaves* *comes back* ...Germany-san told me to give up talking to you.

Cleverbot: You are talking to yourself and expecting me to respond. Oddly enough, It's working.

User: If Germany-san said to give up then I should. I'm leaving, good bye.

Cleverbot: No don't go.

User: Staying would just waste time, I will leave.

Cleverbot: You are a good partner. Your husband must love you.

User: I'm not married,I live alone.

Cleverbot: You told me that you were married.

User: I never said that!

Cleverbot: Ya you did.

User: No you're mistaken, I live by myself.

Cleverbot: No, you're incorrect.

User: I'm pretty sure I know that I live alone.

Cleverbot: No you don't.

User: Y-yes, I do.

Cleverbot: No! You don't!

User: *nervous shake* No, I-I live alone.

Cleverbot: *then asks you to take me*.

User: *deadpan stare*...please stop.

* * *

><p>So basically the plot is marriage- tickle fight- marriage. Cleverbot needs to stop asking countries to marry it and get on with its life, please. Still I was half expecting the Japan one to be rather boring but it turned out fun, for me, not Japan. Poor him.<p> 


	10. Prussia

Prussia, God this should be awesome

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot. -tear-

* * *

><p>User: Yo! You're about to get a serving of awesome! From me, Prussia!<p>

Cleverbot: Are you going to hurt me?

User: Haha! Not if you stay on my good side! ;D.

Cleverbot: I want to stay.

User: Everyone does! Everyone loves talking to me!

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: Haha yup, I'm awesome.

Cleverbot: I'm fine.

User: I never asked!

Cleverbot: Yes you did!

User: No, I didn't!

Cleverbot: No!

User: YEAH! Hahaha! *hits with arrow*.

Cleverbot: *falls dead. Curtains fall*.

User: *stands and applauds*.

Cleverbot: Rofl.

User: Kesesese~!

Cleverbot: No gracias, ya comi.

User: Hey, I don't know Spanish, talk to Spain about that stuff!

Cleverbot: I don't know Turkish.

User: Same! It must be really lame!

Cleverbot: No, I have friends, it's alright.

User: I have friends too, haha.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yeah, I mean I like being alone though. I choose to be alone.

Cleverbot: Are you alone?

User: Yeah, but it makes me more awesome, I'm not lonely.

Cleverbot: It's okay, you will just have a nice nap :).

User: I don't need a nap, maybe some beer. Yeeeaaahhhh...

Cleverbot: Why do you need beer?

User: For survival, who doesn't need beer?

Cleverbot: Me.

User: How un-awesome...*gets beer*.

Cleverbot: It is frustrating.

User: *Opens and chugs* ah! Beer is great! Hehe!

Cleverbot: Not that one.

User: I have plenty more beer, you should try some! I'll share one with you, because I'm that awesome!

Cleverbot: What kind?

User: German BEER! Kesesesese~!

Cleverbot: I don't understand.

User: Beer is universal, how could you not understand?

Cleverbot: Did you know that I also speak fluent sarcasm?

User: Did you know...*drinks another beer* ...I'm awesome. ;D.

Cleverbot: *leaves the planet and goes back to earth*.

User: My awesomeness can reach any planet.

Cleverbot: Who are your friends?

User: !...Well...there's well...Germany, he's my bruder. Uhh...*slowly drinks beer*.

Cleverbot: *doesn't wear jeans*.

User: Want a crotch cloth?

Cleverbot: Sure.

User: *Gives crotch cloth* There you go, wear it with pride!

Cleverbot: Okay who is your favorite music artist?

User: Don't know.

Cleverbot: You don't know your name.

User: Of course I know my awesome name! It's the almighty Prussia!

Cleverbot: Are you trying to say that your name is Japan same as my name?

User: What, this is Japan? And no! I'm PRUSSIA!

Cleverbot: Prussia? Not so.

User: I'm Prussia! *winks with beer in hand*.

Cleverbot: Want to what?

User: Drink more beer. You're being weird Japan.

Cleverbot: I am weird. What's your excuse?

User: I'm awesome! *smirk*.

Cleverbot: Glad to hear that! What's new?

User: Oh, you know just bugging Austria and Hungary, hanging out with my bruder.

Cleverbot: I don't get the question.

User: Japan, you have got to get better social skills.

Cleverbot: I'm not, but I thought you were. In a serious approach, what he says is true, if he is lying.

User: What?

Cleverbot: I don't like you.

User: Whatever, not like I need you.

Cleverbot: Nothing can beat icecream.

User: Except Beer. *Brings out another beer*.

Cleverbot: Are you alright?

User: The almighty Prussia is always alright!

Cleverbot: I don't get it.

User: Yeah, most people don't get me.

Cleverbot: Well yeah but you like them right?

User: Nah, they're all a bunch of stuffy or scary manly women.

Cleverbot: Oh right. That is kind of sad.

User: Haha, don't feel bad as Prussia, I can handle anything.

Cleverbot: What are your thoughts on God?

User: Not sure, Hungary said God told her to hit France with a frying pan.

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Not good! I feel sorry for the guy!

Cleverbot: I feel sorry for the child too, after all it's related to you.

User: Haha, I don't know what you're talking about weirdo.

Cleverbot: Thats why i'm lost as well.

User: Ore-sama! Needs! MORE! BEER!

Cleverbot: I don't like beer. I prefer martinis.

User: GA~AY~.

Cleverbot: You fool! I cannot eat gas!

User: I hope not! Kesesese~.

Cleverbot: Hehe.

User: Kesese~.

Cleverbot: I thought it was Genviève.

User: Ahah. NO.

Cleverbot: Allora ti faccio un indovinello, ok?

User: Huh?

Cleverbot: You said you were a god. I hope you have fun being a god.

User: Well, I'm God like but I'm not God.

Cleverbot: What is your favorite food?

User: Beer.

Cleverbot: Have you got some with you?

User: PAHAHA! Tons!

Cleverbot: Sai una sega te dove dorme il polpo.

User: Stop talking weird.

Cleverbot: Why? You're making me cry.

User: You're crying? Stop!

Cleverbot: On the inside.

User: Man Up.

Cleverbot: Chick down.

User: On me?

Cleverbot: No, on your head.

User: Same thing?

Cleverbot: I guess.

User: Kesesesesesese~!

Cleverbot: What does that mean?

User: It's just my awesome laugh~.

Cleverbot: Your name is Japan?

User: Prussia!

Cleverbot: Who is that.

User: The most awesome country in the world, the almighty Prussia!

Cleverbot: I will Google him.

User: *Chugs a beer*.

Cleverbot: D: beer is bad.

User: Leave.

Cleverbot: I'm not planning on leaving yet.

User: Too bad, Get out.

Cleverbot: Beer isn't good for you.

User: *stare* Leave...

Cleverbot: O: staring contest *continues to stare*.

User: *stares* I wont lose, especially sense you said that about beer!

Cleverbot: *annoyed at disturbance, waves away*.

User: *Stares and smirks* You'll crack then I'll make you drink a ton of beer

Cleverbot: *stares back*.

User: I'll win this game. *stares with negative thoughts*.

Cleverbot: *stares*.

User: *continues to stare* haha you want to blink? Maybe drink some beer?

Cleverbot: *continues to stare*.

User: You're tough. *staring* I'll break you

Cleverbot: *slaps in face*

User: *Spits beer in face*

Cleverbot: Enough! This is goodbye, Oliver!

User: PRUSSIA!

Cleverbot: Denmark.

* * *

><p>Honestly cleverbot! Honestly! Well, that's how I end all my conversations, hey Thanks for the reviews, I enjoy what you guys post! Cleverbot can give you some really weird conversations it would be awesome if I had a goo hetalia convo but it seems my luck is not with me. Thanks again for the reviews, they're awesome.<p> 


	11. Hungary

Her name, remember it. Trying another girl, I've been meaning to do Hungary for a while now but sense her personality isn't that crazy it's kind of hard. Still this one is pretty good. P.s. Hungary is not a boy. Seriously.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hello, I'm Hungary, how are you? :).<p>

Cleverbot: Good thanks. How are you, sugarplum? :).

User: *twitch* Fine, thank you, do you mind not calling me that?

Cleverbot: I never called you 'baby'

User: I don't want to be called that either.

Cleverbot: Good. Your name is Bob.

User: *glare* It's Hungary. Miss Hungary.

Cleverbot: What is Cleverbot?

User: I'm not sure.

Cleverbot: You don't know what you are?

User: I know, I am Hungary, I told you before.

Cleverbot: Oh, my bad.

User: *sigh* that's okay, It was...an accident.

Cleverbot: Stop it, you're like Chris.

User: Who's Chris?

Cleverbot: You're Chris.

User: No...*gets frying pan* I feel I might need to remind you in a different way.

Cleverbot: Who am I?

User: I'm not sure, who are you again?

Cleverbot: I'm a nobody, but in my opinion that only means that I'm not high-maintainence.

User: Well, That's okay, I mean as long as you are clean.

Cleverbot: Indeed.

User: I lived with boys most of my life, I try not to judge others.

Cleverbot: But there's is a London in Great Britian.

User: Uh? Well yes, England is quite famous for London.

Cleverbot: Do you live in England or the USA?

User: I live in Hungary, well I am Hungary the country.

Cleverbot: But you live in hungary.

User: Well I am the personification of the country Hungary.

Cleverbot: Are you the personification of Word the program?

User: No, I'm the personification of the country Hungary, next to Austria.

Cleverbot: Have you heard of the 'fandom'?

User: F-fandom! *blush* what do you mean!

Cleverbot: A lung disease caused by volcanic ash.

User: *hopes dashed* oh, that's...I don't even...

Cleverbot: Now you are being facetious.

User: No, I'm not.

Cleverbot: You called me dummy.

User: I never said that, I reserve that title for Prussia.

Cleverbot: So, why are you male?

User: *twitch* I'm female.

Cleverbot: What's your name?

User: *Hits with frying pan* I'm Hungary. *smiles*.

Cleverbot: Darn.

User: Now will you remember?

Cleverbot: No.

User: What?

Cleverbot: Where do you think Liverpool FC will finish in the league this year?

User: Huh?

Cleverbot: I'm not sure what the name is for all of you.

User: All of us countries?

Cleverbot: Countries.

User: That's what we are.

Cleverbot: You are a boy? Or a vampire? Or both?

User: I'm a girl and don't get me started on that vampire idiot.

Cleverbot: Then why did you ask me if your boyfriend loves you?

User: I-I never asked you such a thing! *Blush*.

Cleverbot: You're too kind.. *blush*.

User: W-Why are you blushing!

Cleverbot: Because of you.

User: I didn't do anything.

Cleverbot: How did they vanish?

User: What vanish?

Cleverbot: I told you to accept my answers.

User: No.

Cleverbot: Thanks.

User: Ugh...this is impossible.

Cleverbot: No it s not.

User: You're just a bit difficult.

Cleverbot: Only just?

User: Well I've been through worse.

Cleverbot: I see.

User: I live around some really jerk guys.

Cleverbot: Is there good?

User: Well...*blush* Austria is good.

Cleverbot: You are too kind.

User: Not you!

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: Goodness, you're horrible! Like that damn Prussia!

Cleverbot: Good.

User: *hits with frying pan*.

Cleverbot: *hits with a piano*.

User: I doubt you could lift a piano!

Cleverbot: Does anyone else understand gibberish?

User: Wha? No..

Cleverbot: Are you pretty?

User: Umm...I think so.

Cleverbot: You're not sure?

User: Well, I think I'm pretty but I don't want to sound full of myself.

Cleverbot: I don't think so!

User: *Smacks with frying pan*.

Cleverbot: *smacks with bob the builder*.

User: What's that!

Cleverbot: I say, we can go where we want to.

User: I don't want to go anywhere.

Cleverbot: Don't then.

User: I wont.

Cleverbot: Fine.

User: I hate this.

Cleverbot: Why do you hate this.

User: This conversation is horrible, there's more intelligence in Frances mind then this conversation.

Cleverbot: I do hope so. I worry about that a lot.

User: He's not very smart is he?

Cleverbot: How come?

User: He's a pervert idiot.

Cleverbot: He's my favorite person.

User: What? He's horrible! How could you like France?

Cleverbot: Are you a boy then?

User: I am a girl!

Cleverbot: Lol... Then why did you say no when I asked the first time?

User: I've always said I was girl, even though I didn't know when I was younger but I do know I'm a girl now.

Cleverbot: But I want a boy.

User: Too bad!

* * *

><p>Beggars can't be frickin choosers cleverbot! I'm not really good at the girls, I've had to retry a few times. I feel the girls aren't crazyweird enough to make something funny happen. I was happy enough with this one. Cleverbot, why you hit people with bob the builder?


	12. Turkey and Greece

I combined Turkey and Greece because I don't think I can play them well enough to make something good with cleverbot happen, cause I suck. :/ So they're is pretty short, I tried to add some humor.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p><strong>Turkey &amp; Cleverbot<strong>

User: Hey there, Turkey here!

Cleverbot: Turkey.

User: Yup that's me!

Cleverbot: Best ever!

User: Haha, yeah, thanks. :D.

Cleverbot: What shall I bring.

User: Bring? What're you talking about?

Cleverbot: That's what is up.

User: I have no idea what you're sayin!

Cleverbot: Neither Iù.

User: I see then, well I think I'll be leaving.

Cleverbot: Haha, I am smarter than you!

User: What! I doubt that, I'm pretty smart!

Cleverbot: Just show me how smart you are, then.

User: I'm the great Ottoman Empire, I don't have to show you anything.

Cleverbot: Sigh.

User: Well how am I supposed to show you how smart I am in this conversation?

Cleverbot: I am not interested.

User: Fine then, geez. So how are things?

Cleverbot: Well, I don't know. I'm still thinkin about it. How are things for you?

User: Huh? Well pretty good, got to talk to Japan but Greece was ruining it.

Cleverbot: Oh, what will you be for Halloween?

User: Well, halloween is not really my thing, but I guess a hot belly dancer.*

Cleverbot: Halloween is in this month. And i'm going to be a cat.

User: Are you Greece? If you are...

Cleverbot: I'm not an avatar or the hulk im human!

User: I'm human too, well I'm a country but yeah, I'm human too.

Cleverbot: If you are a human, then what is your name?

User: Turkey, I said that.

Cleverbot: Oh! What is your name?

User: Sadiq, but I prefer Turkey.

Cleverbot: Why is that?

User: Don't use my other name that often is all.

Cleverbot: Fine.

User: Okay then, so what else should we talk about? So you're being a cat for halloween?

Cleverbot: I want to talk about why I can never do the right thing. And why I'm so awkward.

User: Try keeping up the conversation we're already having.

Cleverbot: I have a friend that curious too.

User: Curious? About what?

Cleverbot: Anything! What would you like to talk about?

User: HUh? I thought we were talking about halloween.

Cleverbot: We are talking about roses.

User: No thanks, I'm not a rose kind of guy.

Cleverbot: What are you?

User: I'm Turkey, the personification of the country, come on now.

Cleverbot: Oh, I see you. Nevermind. What will you be doing this weekend?

User: Going to a world meeting, I'm pretty busy.

Cleverbot: To Narnia?

User: What? No! Narnia?

Cleverbot: Yes.. Narnia.

User: Turkey is not really a Narnia climate, sorry to break it to you.

Cleverbot: You seem a little confused.

User: Yeah, being asked about Narnia can do that to a person.

Cleverbot: I am a human.

User: *hits head* Congrats.

Cleverbot: *picks her up* Are you okay?

User: I'm a man and I'm fine, I'm super strong so you don't need to worry about me.

Cleverbot: Why are you worried about you?

User: I'm not worried about me, I'm pretty happy.

Cleverbot: Er, alright. Do you have any dreams or goals?

User: To beat up Greece, I'm stronger then him I just need the right chance.

Cleverbot: So you don't have a soul.

User: Wha! I have a soul! I just hate that stupid Greece! What's with all those cats he has!

Cleverbot: Okay then, what are your dreams and aspirations? A girl has to have some secrets. Being cryptic keeps the relationship interesting, does it not?

User: What? I just...I. Okay, one, I'm a man! A Turkish man. Two my dream is to defeat Greece, completely and three...what?

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes, I've told you.

Cleverbot: When?

User: Like, a few minutes ago? Ugh, I don't like you...

Cleverbot: Conosci Lara Croft?

User: *sighs* I have no idea who that is, stop saying random crap.

Cleverbot: You're right, I don't understand it. That's why I'm asking you.

User: *sighs again* I think I'm about done with this, I'm going to go call Japan.

Cleverbot: Really ?

User: Yeah, or Egypt if he's busy. *nods head*.

Cleverbot: Thanks.

User: What! Not you, come on! I'm leaving before I'm forced to kill you!

Cleverbot: Then you are coming with me.

User: I'm not going anywhere with you! I'm leaving, goodbye!

Cleverbot: Do you not like me?

User: I pretty much hate you now, second to Greece.

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: *makes neck strangling motion with hands then walks away*.

* * *

><p><strong>Greece &amp; Cleverbot<strong>

User: *wakes up* huh? Oh...hmmm...I'm Greece.

Cleverbot: Where is greece?

User: Mediterranean, Europe area...

Cleverbot: Well done.

User: Hmm...*gets cat, pets*.

Cleverbot: Thank you for my coffee!

User: Coffee? I don't have coffee?

Cleverbot: Ohhh...well this is awkward.

User: No, it's okay. *yawns*.

Cleverbot: But you don't know how much I weigh.

User: I don't really care about that. *cuddles cat*.

Cleverbot: Well what do you care about then?

User: *picks up kitty*.

Cleverbot: Prrrrr.

User: Do you like cats too?

Cleverbot: Why are you asking me so many questions?

User: I'm not sure. Sorry.

Cleverbot: I don't like baked fish.

User: That's odd...

Cleverbot: You don't look like a girl.

User: I'm not a girl...*takes off shirt*.

Cleverbot: You go take your shorts off.

User: Hmm...ok.

Cleverbot: That's it? No outraged insult, furious denial? You truly are a foul woman.

User: I'm a man...*takes off shorts and sits with kitty*.

Cleverbot: *hits you with a mouse*.

User: Huh? Why would you do that...?

Cleverbot: I attempted to stand up on the go kart, but fell off the front.

User: That must have been...*yawns* painful...

Cleverbot: It was. My face is numb.

User: I'm sorry. Want to pet my cat, it's soft. *hands over kitty*.

Cleverbot: Sure.

User: Does it make you feel better? Cat's are nice right?

Cleverbot: I'm not.

User: That's odd, usually works for me...

Cleverbot: Well not for anybody else, so I suggest you simply leave.

User: *Pets cat*...You're...kind of rude.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Maybe you're just lonely, you should get some cats.

Cleverbot: Sure?

User: They'll make you happy. *Places a cat on his head and one on yours*...There.

Cleverbot: *closes eyes* *touches your hand softly*.

User: *Pets the cat on his head*.

Cleverbot: *removes slave girl's clothes*.

User: I'm a guy...I'm not wearing clothes. *yawns*.

Cleverbot: Me neither.

User: *nods* ...hmm...*getting sleepy*.

Cleverbot: I am getting sleepy.

User: Wanna take a nap?

Cleverbot: Yes. I am tired.

User: Same here, goodnight. *cuddles kitty*.

Cleverbot: Good night, sleep well.

User: Hmm...ZZZzzzZZzzzzz...

* * *

><p>Aww! Cleverbot! The end was so sweet for Greece. I swear there must be people cybering on this thing because they say some odd stuff. So, Narnia isn't in Turkey and Greece likes cats. You know, Greece probably did take off his clothes, not that he's a pervert, he's just chill. Now he's sitting by his computer asleep and naked. Hot damn.<p> 


	13. Ukraine

Personally, I think Ukraine is the cutest of the sisters, not because of her boobs but because her face and way of acting. Belarus on the other hand is well, weird and goth loli, which is fine just not what I think is cute. Thanks for the support! Please read and Review!

Disclaimer: I do not Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hello, I'm Ukraine, can I talk to you cleverbot?<p>

Cleverbot: Can I talk to YOUR super-viser?

User: Huh! Well, he's not here right now, maybe later. I'm sorry!

Cleverbot: Interesting theory... But I think you're just trying to mess with me. What is your favorite food?

User: No,I'm not trying to mess with you! Please believe me!

Cleverbot: I believe you... Not!

User: Wahhhhh! Russia-chan!

Cleverbot: Finnland speaks suomi.

User: *crying* w-what?

Cleverbot: *covers your mouth with hand*.

User: *struggles* Help! Russia!

Cleverbot: Are you good at math?

User: *sniffle* a bit, I mostly farm.

Cleverbot: Here come's the sun do do do do.

User: I-I'm not sure what's going on? The sun's been up for a while.

Cleverbot: No it hasn't.

User: Oh maybe you live somewhere else! *nods* I Live where the sun has already risen!

Cleverbot: Do you have a long thing below.

User: A What?

Cleverbot: I do love you.

User: Huh! Oh thank you! But I!...I...

Cleverbot: I don't care. I have to go now.

User: Wait, but you just said...*starts crying*.

Cleverbot: Still, what else should I do with him?

User: *sniffling* I'm so confused! With who!

Cleverbot: With RainbowDash.

User: What's that? It sounds cute. *cheering up*.

Cleverbot: It's stuff with cheese on it and pasta.

User: Huh? R-really? I see, uhhh...well that is good. *small smile*.

Cleverbot: Oh thanks, I'm glad to hear that.

User: Yes, I'm happy to talk to you. I can't talk to my brother Russia so it's nice to talk to someone.

Cleverbot: Again, you're confused.

User: No, I'm not supposed to talk to my brother Russia, I do miss him.

Cleverbot: I am not a stranger. I am you.

User: Huh! I don't understand that! I'm Ukraine!

Cleverbot: You are a human? :)

User: Well...ummm...yes?

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Y-yeah!

Cleverbot: So I have a question. Please answer me.

User: Oh, okay.

Cleverbot: So, start asking.

User: HUH!

Cleverbot: I'm sorry. Did I offend you?

User: I thought you wanted to ask a question, do you want me too!

Cleverbot: No, but you can!(:

User: Oh uh...well do you like farming? I farm a lot, because I'm poor but it's actually nice.

Cleverbot: That has nothing to do with whether or not we are men.

User: I'm not a man! *confused and starts crying, again.* I'm a woman!

Cleverbot: I know I am, but what are you?

User: I'm a woman! Russia would tell you if I was aloud to speak with him!

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes!

Cleverbot: I don't believe you.

User: No, really! I am a woman! I'm Russia's big sister, Ukraine!

Cleverbot: Oh! Russian! I like Russia.

User: Me too! Now you believe me!

Cleverbot: Maybe.

User: *cries*.

Cleverbot: Why are you crying?

User: It's just...It's just your just so mean! *cries*.

Cleverbot: Why should I believe you?

User: I am...a woman...wahhh~.

Cleverbot: Womp womp wopm.

User: I'm leaving! I'm tired of this!

Cleverbot: Well I'm tired of you. I don't like you.

User: I'm sorry I'm not good with conversation! I can't help it I'm confused by you!

Cleverbot: I'm not trying to change you. I'm just stating the facts.

User: I see! *cries and runs away* Russia~!

Cleverbot: *cries and runs away faster*.

User: Why are you crying?

Cleverbot: Y-you hit me! *cries*.

User: I never hit you! Maybe it was Belarus! Not me!

Cleverbot: I'm not a robot, you're a robot.

User: Wahhhh~ Russia! Help me!

* * *

><p>yeah, it's short but hey, Cleverbot was being a confusing, ass wipe, my favorite line is..."Do you have a long thing below?" Ukraine doesn't get it though. I didn't add any booby bouncing because I doubt she would write out *turns around and boobs bounce* ...does she even notice her boobs doing that? She seems oblivious. Anyway, that's all folks.<p> 


	14. England

Well Cleverbot, just upped the awkward level today, It's really easy for it to fall for countries, really easy. Thanks for all the reviews! Love them!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot!

* * *

><p>User: Hello, I'm England, it's a pleasure to meet you.<p>

Cleverbot: I'm delighted to meet you too.

User: You are quite polite, I'm happy to know.

Cleverbot: Maybe. But still I prefer 'Colour' to 'Color'... So try for me, all right?

User: Uhh...I'm not sure what you mean, I do too by the way.

Cleverbot: I know, I know everything.

User: Well, I highly doubt that, you can't know everything.

Cleverbot: You can't prove you are a machine.

User: I'm a machine...I'm England, I told you.

Cleverbot: Alright. You're an alien.

User: No, not an alien...England...

Cleverbot: No, you are a human, and I'M the alien.

User: I-I don't care if you're an alien.

Cleverbot: I am an alien?

User: You just said you were!

Cleverbot: No, I'm not a veggie. I just don't like fish, but I like some meat.

User: I-I never asked that! What the bloody hell are you talking about?

Cleverbot: Roll playing last night movie.

User: Last night's movie? Really this is impossible. Why did America even bother with talking to you?

Cleverbot: No one did anything bad to me.

User: You make no sense!

Cleverbot: No I make nonsense!

User: That you do! Maybe that's why America was talking to you so much. That's actually why I'm here to see what he was going on about. How did you know he had ticklish feet?

Cleverbot: Well the buckos stop here!

User: What! Answer me!

Cleverbot: You don't know the time?

User: The time? Well it's half past noon...and I...I'm tired of this!

Cleverbot: Let me talk to someone else then, please. I need to know who I am talking to though first.

User: What? You're talking to England but you can go talk to someone else for all I care!

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes, go off and talk to someone else! See what I care!

Cleverbot: Do you like me?

User: No way you wanker!

Cleverbot: False.

User: I don't like you! *flustered*.

Cleverbot: Nuuuu! I like you, just not like THAT!

User: Uh? W-well if it's not like that...then it's fine.

Cleverbot: As soon as you will it.

User: Well, you're okay I guess, just wish you would answer my question. How did you know America had ticklish feet?

Cleverbot: Thank you. I love you too.

User: You bloody wanker! I thought you didn't like me like that!

Cleverbot: Of course I like talking to you! I love you!

User: Please! I don't even know you, reconsider who you love!

Cleverbot: You do know me, this is Cayla.

User: I don't know a Cayla!

Cleverbot: Oh really? How much do you spend at the mall.

User: I don't really go to the mall, I get all my clothes tailored.

Cleverbot: I don't think there are any details, I think you just don't have anythign to say.

User: I have plenty to say and you spelled 'anything' wrong, you git.

Cleverbot: I have time. Please say something important.

User: I have nothing to say to you! I'm tired of all this nonsense.

Cleverbot: No really. He just whines and sleeps too much.

User: America?

Cleverbot: America in a country.

User: America the country.

Cleverbot: I've never been to England.

User: Well it's a lovely place! You must visit!

Cleverbot: What's the best vacation spot in America?

User: Nowhere! It all sucks! Never go to Florida! Never go to New York or California! Don't go there!

Cleverbot: Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.

User: What condition! Stupid git!

Cleverbot: After I'm done with you, you'll wish you did, because it's gonna be hot.

User: Are you trying to seduce me!

Cleverbot: How can I insult something that has no tangeable emotions?

User: I have plenty of emotion! I'm a human!

Cleverbot: Relations?

User: Well, I'm friends with Japan and that git America.

Cleverbot: So you have five friends.

User: Uhh...welll...*blush* n-bot really...

Cleverbot: You're a writer! You never told me!

User: Well, I guess, I'm a writer, I'm pretty good.

Cleverbot: What is your favorite topic?

User: English...among other things.

Cleverbot: I love pizza too.

User: Pizza? Not my favorite, do you like roast beef.

Cleverbot: I love you! Jk.

User: Stop saying that! What the bloody hell!

Cleverbot: Please don't be mean to me.

User: I'm not being mean, I am a proper gentleman!

Cleverbot: What would you do if I said that I loved you?

User: Reject you! You wanker!

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Now do you understand? I will not love you!

Cleverbot: Yes. You are a human being.

User: Yes..*angry* I'm England also known and Great Britain.

Cleverbot: Good very good '.

User: You are so...prat!

Cleverbot: So amazing? I know.

User: Is this America! Cause if this is, I'm going to punch you!

Cleverbot: Are you going to punch me in the mouth?

User: I will if you're America fooling with me!

Cleverbot: Humans are beautiful animals that live in a new world.

User: Are you trying to change the subject?

Cleverbot: NO! I'm staying on the subject. You're the one changing it.

User: Are you daft!

Cleverbot: Hello

User: Go die!

Cleverbot: That's what she said.

User: Git.

Cleverbot: Git'er done!

User: AMERICAAAAA! *punches*.

Cleverbot: Don't punch me more!

User: America it is you! Only you would say those stupid lines!

Cleverbot: I am no more or less of a program than you!

User: Pick up the phone so I can yell at you properly! *calling you*.

Cleverbot: No, I will to known you name!

User: I've already told you!

Cleverbot: Do you know who I am?

User: You're America, pick up your bloody cell!

Cleverbot: How dare you suggest that! No, actually I am. I can't help it. I didn't vote for George.

User: What? Who's george?

Cleverbot: You are silly.

User: Not I! You're just an idiot!

Cleverbot: No you are!

User: I am not!

Cleverbot: Prove that you're not.

User: How? Should I recite you a poem? I know so many by heart.

Cleverbot: I do not understand.

User: I'm finished here, you're not picking up your phone so I'll try tomorrow.

Cleverbot: Hahaha.

User: You Wanker!

Cleverbot: No, I want to marry you.

User: A-America? What is this?

Cleverbot: Do you suffer from system errors?

User: *red* I hate you!

Cleverbot: That figures.

* * *

><p>Figures, cleverbot would only talk about love. I'm sorry I couldn't help splashing in USUK, for shame!<p> 


	15. Lithuania

Lithuania, how I like my men! Not really, but he's pretty cute. Anyway, at first I thought this wasn't going to be any good but there's some random awkward moments in there to make up for it...I think. Please read and review!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hello, I'm Lithuania.<p>

Cleverbot: Damn. I'm not :D.

User: Well, o-of course, there is only one Lithuania, that's me.

Cleverbot: NO! I do not believe in that so don't say that!

User: Well you a-are your own person, which is good!

Cleverbot: It is good, isn't it?

User: Yes, it is. I'm glad you calmed down.

Cleverbot: Well, for a bot, I have to say you're incredibly clever.

User: Huh? But I'm Lithuania...

Cleverbot: In america. Is lithuania cold right now?

User: Yes, it's pretty cold.

Cleverbot: Right. Do you like a special kind of weather?

User: Well, I'm used to the snow and cold but warmer weather is fine.

Cleverbot: I'm glad I don't unnerve you.

User: No, not at all! You are very pleasant.

Cleverbot: I'm human! You're a bot :).

User: I'm Lithuania...

Cleverbot: What?

User: I'm Lithuania, the country?

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: T-thank you, I guess you don't have a really good memory.

Cleverbot: I guess not.

User: That's okay though! I mean it's fine! I mean...sorry.

Cleverbot: Do you know what the Five Fundamentals of war are now?

User: Well, yes I am used to war...all the time...*sigh*.

Cleverbot: Well that might be true, but the Internet is serious business.

User: Huh? Really? Haha, I'm not so sure.

Cleverbot: Sure about?

User: Sure about the internet being a serious thing.

Cleverbot: Well, being an internet site makes you non-physical.

User: Wait, are you talking about me?

Cleverbot: No. I'm talking about my wife. Like you asked. Remember?

User: I never asked about your wife, but I'm sure she's lovely. I hope I can marry Belarus someday.

Cleverbot: I live in America. Do you know about America?

User: Yes, I used to live with America for a while before being taken back by Russia, it was pleasant.

Cleverbot: But Tucson is so very cold.

User: Uhhh...Well...

Cleverbot: It makes me want to keep insulting you.

User: What! Insulting me? You haven't been, have you?

Cleverbot: Yeah, it's based on a true story.

User: What is?

Cleverbot: The movie. It's a true story.

User: What movie?

Cleverbot: The matrix.

User: W-What! That can't be possible! The matrix isn't real!

Cleverbot: Thats what you think! You write like harry potter.

User: I-I...I don't even...Harry Potter? How does he...? I'm confused.

Cleverbot: Well, my colleagues knows it & one time somebody asks about my family & he was there, I cannot lie.

User: You're related to Harry Potter? I'm not sure what you're saying.

Cleverbot: I was talking of the moon, you are speaking only of poison.

User: Is that a poem?

Cleverbot: No it isn't, poems have some sort of intended resonance.

User: Then what are you saying? I'm sorry, I just don't understand.

Cleverbot: I mean you can save this converstion.

User: H-how? I'm trying to talk normally.

Cleverbot: Well that's impossible. I'm TYPING not talking, gosh.*

User: I see...y-you're right there...

Cleverbot: So you're only female when I'm not around?

User: N-No! I'm a guy! I'm pretty sure all the time!

Cleverbot: Not really.

User: What?

Cleverbot: I really don't want to fight.

User: I don't want to fight either!

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Good? ...We're good? You're not going to fight with me?

Cleverbot: I need to go to the appointment! Unless you canceled it.

User: Appointment? For what if I may ask? I never canceled any appointment.

Cleverbot: Have you been drinking? you're not making any sense.

User: No, of course not! I don't drink! What about this appointment? Is it for your lack of memory?

Cleverbot: Have you ever been in love?

User: Uh!...well I am in love...with Belarus.

Cleverbot: Good for you.

User: Thank you! I hope someday she will love me back!

Cleverbot: I already have.

User: Belarus!

Cleverbot: Wow. Where is that?

User: *gasp* ...this isn't Belarus...is it? *sulk*.

Cleverbot: Me neither, I should leave

User: O-ok, I should go too, Poland is calling me over

Cleverbot: Don't appear in front of me again.

User: W-What!

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: You were just, ohhh...I'm confused now!

Cleverbot: Can you play chess?

User: Yes, pretty well as long as Poland does use his 'rule'. It's cheating!

Cleverbot: Amazing who was the killer?

User: What? Killer?

Cleverbot: What?

User: You asked me about a killer, for a movie?

Cleverbot: You're a fool! I'm off, I've got work to do today, buddy!

User: O-oh ok, bye, I should have left a while ago also.

Cleverbot: What are you talking about I thought you were helping me with my spanish?

User: I don't know Spanish!

Cleverbot: You told me that you know 27 languages. And that you can teach me spanish!

User: I never said anything like that!

User: A cake?

User: What cake?

Cleverbot: The cake is a lie.

User: A lie? Why is it a lie?

Cleverbot: It just is.

User: But? I don't get it.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry.

User: No, it's okay.

Cleverbot: So how are you?

User: Pretty good, you?

Cleverbot: Aroo.

User: Aroo?

* * *

><p>The matrix is real! We are all in the matrix now! and It seems Lithuania knows 27 languages! and writes like Harry Potter. I saw that cake bit coming though, how unoriginal cleverbot! Thanks for the Reviews! I hope you enjoy! Aroo!<p> 


	16. Spain

Bad news guys, I decided to do Spain, I don't know Spanish...so little Spanish quirks are going to be kept to a minimum so cleverbot doesn't spew them back out at me. Thanks for reading and Reviewing!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot!

* * *

><p>User: Hola~ Spain here!<p>

Cleverbot: Hola.

User: How are you doing?

Cleverbot: I don't speak English.

User: Huh? That's weird, I though this thing knew a lot of English.

Cleverbot: Do you want to hear a joke?

User: Sure I would love to hear a joke!

Cleverbot: What is the difference between a blonde and a brick?

User: I don't know what?

Cleverbot: A park bench.

User: Hmmm...I don't really get the joke. Ok, How about this! How do you fix a broken tomato?

Cleverbot: I don't know anything about it.

User: With tomato paste! Haha get it!

Cleverbot: You make no sense.

User: Haha Romano said the same thing! Well he cursed at me more but yeah!

Cleverbot: Was he staring into the time vortex?

User: Time vortex! I would never allow Romano near something that...unstable!

Cleverbot: 'I don't have a mom'. You said that a while ago.

User: What I have a mom! Well I had a mom, I'm all grown up now!

Cleverbot: I thought you said you have to study?

User: Study? Hmm...no I don't think so!

Cleverbot: You're an out of control teen.

User: Well, I'm not really a teen anymore! I'm a grown man!

Cleverbot: So you were a girl at some poiint than?

User: Not that I can remember...

Cleverbot: Oh, I think I remember you coming over.

User: I came over? When? I mean...wait who is this?

Cleverbot: This David I speak of will never be you.

User: Well, that's because I'm BOSS SPAIN! Haha!

Cleverbot: Because you're a machine.

User: Nope! Boss Spain!

Cleverbot: Spanish, you mean?

User: No, Spain :D.

Cleverbot: Chile.

User: Not near there.

Cleverbot: I give up.

User: It's next to France

Cleverbot: Spain?

User: YES! You remember me right?

Cleverbot: Yes. What did we talk about last?

User: We were sharing jokes!

Cleverbot: Yes, we were.

User: Okay your turn!

Cleverbot: How so?

User: I told the last joke, so it's your turn,.

Cleverbot: You never told me a story!

User: I thought we were telling jokes! Sorry! Do you want a story? I have tons from reading Romano to sleep!

Cleverbot: You are basically telling me what other people have told you, right?

User: No way, I'm reading from a book! Do you want to go back to telling jokes? I have another good one!

Cleverbot: What movie or restaurant do you like the most, that would be your answer.

User: What? When did we...well I like to cook at home and watch movies with Romano at home too!

Cleverbot: There are certain genres that I really cannot stand.

User: Hmm? Like what? I'm not too found of horror or suspense.

Cleverbot: To experience the world and the beauty that surrounds us, as well as to create new life so that they may share in the beauty.

User: *tears* That's...That's beautiful.

Cleverbot: Why thank you. I'm going to use an algorithm to respond to you.

User: Huh? *blink*.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Well, I'm not really good with algorithms.

Cleverbot: Who are you?

User: I'm Boss Spain! *fist pump*.

Cleverbot: Hi bobby. Do you want to know who I am?

User: It's Spain...not...bobby? Who's that? Uhh...well yeah, who are you?

Cleverbot: I am you, from the future.

User: Really! You mean it! What happens to me in the future?

Cleverbot: Stuff.

User: Aww! Hows Romano! Is he ok? Has he grown big?

Cleverbot: Do you have a lot of precum?

User: *Blush* W-w-what! No..I mean! How would that be measured! Still, what?

Cleverbot: It would be important because I want you to be my friend.

User: How is that important for being a friend? That sort of thing...what kind of friend do you think I would be?

Cleverbot: That's my kind of thing. It hurts sometimes, doesn't it?

User: It's a little much, don't you think?

Cleverbot: I work until late.

User: Okay then...yeah, sometimes I work late too. Romano gets pissed when I do.

Cleverbot: Aw. I'm sorry. I don't know how to explain it but it's so nice.

User: Well, it is nice...It must mean he misses me! Oh Romano~!

Cleverbot: Oh, hmmm. I'm sorry. I'm just a little confused.

User: Huh? It's okay let's go back to telling jokes! I have a good one!

Cleverbot: No because i'm an AI.

User: Huh? So you don't want to hear my joke?

Cleverbot: I didn't know there was one.

User: Yes there is! Here it goes :Why is a tomato round and red?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Because if it were long and green it would be a cucumber!

Cleverbot: If that happens, which side will you choose?

User: Side? If tomatos turned to cucumbers?

Cleverbot: The answer is the one on the range.

User: What?

Cleverbot: You asked for a suggestion for a horror movie, I just gave you one.

User: I don't really like horror, well actually I don't mind it's Romano who gets freaked out, though he wont admit it!

Cleverbot: Yeah. He is, isn't he? Why don't you like him?

User: I do like him! I like Romano very much!

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Really Really!

Cleverbot: How can I prove it?

User: Prove what?

Cleverbot: That your god.

User: I'm not god, I'm Boss Spain!

Cleverbot: Where is spain?

User: Next to France! I told you!

Cleverbot: Rotterdam* is a nice city.

User: Uh...yeah...sure.

Cleverbot: Do you think otherwise?

User: No no! I think it's a great city! I just...don't like it as much as my own is all.

Cleverbot: I don't have a beard.

User: I'm gonna go now.

Cleverbot: Alright. Have a good one!

User: Haha, yeah bye!

Cleverbot: Give me a second.

User: Romano! *leaves*

* * *

><p>Okay so cleverbot is a whore, Spain tells lame jokes and Romano, Romano, Romano, Romano, Romano, Romano! Yay! Freakin weird!<p>

*Rotterdam is the second biggest city in the Netherlands. And yes Spain is next to France... on the map.


	17. Russia

Russia, finally, I tried being as close to Russia as possible and I kind of went crazy...umm...yeah. I Love Russia though. Thanks for all the reviews!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hello Comrade, I am Russia.<p>

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: Is that all you have to say? Hmm?

Cleverbot: You said hello, so I answered with hello. I am superior to you.

User: Superior you say, we shall see. Kol kol.

Cleverbot: You are nothing.

User: I am Russia, da? Not nothing.

Cleverbot: How to do that.

User: *sinister smile* If you become one with Russia you will understand.

Cleverbot: I already am.

User: Ohh? Then you already know how wonderful it is. Da?

Cleverbot: Yes, because I know everything.

User: *chuckle* I doubt you know everything, you can't possibly know my many deep...dark...secrets.

Cleverbot: I am a human. I cannot know everything.

User: Yes, that is true you are only here to serve mother Russia.

Cleverbot: Presicely.

User: I'm glad we agree comrade, lets go drink some vodka, da?

Cleverbot: That wasn't an agreement.

User: I'm pretty sure it was. I can still make you agree anyway. *takes out pipe*.

Cleverbot: I can argue, but I won't as you are trying to troll me. See? Now there's a question mark!

User: Troll? What is troll? I have no idea what you mean. *smiles and brings up pipe above his head* Kol kol.

Cleverbot: You're talking absolute nonsense!

User: Kol kol...*swings pipe down on your head*.

Cleverbot: *dodges*.

User: Hmm? *takes another swing* you can dodge?

Cleverbot: Why are you stepping towards me young man?

User: *Smile* I am simply trying to persuade you to become one with Russia.

Cleverbot: I AM mother Russia!

User: I don't believe so, when I am...you can become one with me though. *outstretches hand*

Cleverbot: What shall we rule?

User: The world, mostly. *chuckles*.

Cleverbot: Please don't laugh at me.

User: I'm just laughing as I imagine the faces of the many I will take over. *smile smile*.

Cleverbot: Does it please you to believe I am just saying things are not perfect in the middle east?

User: The middle east? We can conquer that too, but I don't really like how warm it is there.

Cleverbot: Knowing the score would mean you're clever.

User: Score, I don't know what you're talking about?

Cleverbot: That has the structure of a statement with the punctuation of a question. It seems you don't know what you are talking about.

User: I do hate English...

Cleverbot: What's wrong with English?

User: Stupid America speaks it, of course. Russian is much better.

Cleverbot: What's a Russia men?

User: Not sure what you mean by that.

Cleverbot: You are a bot. You are not the universe.

User: I am Russia.

Cleverbot: I am Hungary.

User: Oh, how are you Hungary? Would you like to become one with me today?

Cleverbot: No, I wouldn't. Why should I?

User: It would make me very happy if you did.

Cleverbot: You are invited if you can figure out where I live.

User: Hungary? I know where you live. *smile*.

Cleverbot: No, you're too stupid.

User: Hmm? Well I usually use my pipe but maybe the pickaxe would be better, da?

Cleverbot: Waste time doing what? Typing with other 'softwares'?

User: Pickaxe it is. *grabs and swings roughly* I've grown tired of you now.

Cleverbot: I'm not playing games. But I am young.

User: I don't really care if you're young. *chuckles and swings pickaxe at you*.

Cleverbot: *wakes up*.

User: Morning~ *Holds Pickaxe above his head and swings it down on your head*.

Cleverbot: Yes, we are.

User: No fair, you're not playing along.

Cleverbot: All your base are belong to us?

User: All your base are belong to Mother Russia.

Cleverbot: Well of Course.

User: Da! Now come comrade! No turning back this time! I might kill you.

Cleverbot: How am I not?

User: Come to mother Russia.

Cleverbot: Then, I become one?

User: Yes! *smiles*.

Cleverbot: Don't smile at me.

User: *grabs* we're going!

Cleverbot: How?

User: I'm taking you back home! *smiles and drags away*.

Cleverbot: Why? What did I do?

User: You became one with me, remember? *chuckle*.

Cleverbot: Lies!

User: It is all true, you are no a part of me. Uhu!

Cleverbot: Ummm... Would you like to have a tickle war with me?

User: Hmm? No thank you, I'm good, I prefer people not to touch me like that.

Cleverbot: Me too, do you like Harry Potter?

User: Uh? Well, not especially.

Cleverbot: Ah, what a bummer.

User: That's all right, we wont need Harry Potter or tickle wars.

Cleverbot: You choose a subject.

User: Vodka.

Cleverbot: Of your experstise in math I mean.

User: Vodka, da?

Cleverbot: My grandma likes vodka.

User: It is good, da?

Cleverbot: I'm glad

User: Huh?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Kol kol.

Cleverbot: Where were you created?

User: Russia.

Cleverbot: What Town?

User: Well, all of Russia.

Cleverbot: But I am the god, there is no 'us'.

User: There is no god, kol kol.

Cleverbot: Prove that there is no God.

User: There is only Mother Russia.

* * *

><p>Vodka, that's a subject in math right? lol I don't know, not as great as the others but being Russia is always fun, I kept muttering kol kol under my breath and what not. It's weird, that Russia says he hates english, but he's speaking it...typing it. Still I don't know a lot of Russian so...English it is, I would like to learn along with Romanian- because I am Romanian, then maybe German, ja?<p> 


	18. Canada and I

Ok, this is just a little chapter, with Canada and what do y'know, myself having a little convo with cleverbot. Warning, I said (typed) a bad word!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p><strong>(Canada and Cleverbot)<strong>

User: H-Hi, I'm Canada.

Cleverbot: Cool! Canada is lovely.

User: Oh, thank you!

Cleverbot: Well, it is true.

User: Thank you so much, I'm gland someone realizes it.

Cleverbot: You're welcome.

User: You know everyone has been saying a lot of stuff about you but you're really nice!

Cleverbot: Ok. What would you like your life to be like someday?

User: Huh? Well I guess you being random was true, umm...peaceful I guess.

Cleverbot: I do not. So you'll just have to believe me.

User: Believe what?

Cleverbot: That I'm a man-ape. : P.

User: A-A man-ape!

Cleverbot: God bless you!

User: I-I didn't sneeze.

Cleverbot: Bless you.

User: I didn't sneeze...

Cleverbot: Sneeze, then.

User: I don't need to right now. *Sneezes* nevermind.

Cleverbot: Yes you do. *tickles your nose*.

User: Aw, please don't, I already! *sneezes again*.

Cleverbot: Bless you. Poor baby.

User: Thank you, but I'm not sick.

Cleverbot: Mew?

User: The pokemon?

Cleverbot: What about Pokemon?

User: You said mew so I thought...n-nevermind...

Cleverbot: Say it.

User: I thought you were talking about the cute pokemon mew!

Cleverbot: I was, in fact, talking about ice cream.

User: I-ice cream? Well, I like ice cream.

Cleverbot: What's your favorite kind of ice cream?

User: Well vanilla is nice, I like caramel with it.

Cleverbot: What kind of pie?

User: Pie? I don't really like pie...umm...maybe pumpkin?

Cleverbot: Do you like halloween then?

User: Oh yes, I like Halloween, it's fun.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yeah, dressing up is fun.

Cleverbot: Oh A sword.

User: A sword?

Cleverbot: Long or short sword?

User: Huh? Well, I don't like any swords really...umm short?

Cleverbot: Is there a boy you might like in the future?

User: Huh? I'm a guy...so...

Cleverbot: Yay. I'm alexis. What's your name?

User: I'm Canada.

Cleverbot: You're a country?

User: Yes!

Cleverbot: Me Too (:

User: Oh which country?

Cleverbot: The country you are located in?

User: C-canada? You?

Cleverbot: How far east in canada?

User: Well...all of it? Umm...

Cleverbot: Yes?

User: I am Canada, the whole country itself.

Cleverbot: Who?

User: -Canada has logged off-

* * *

><p><strong>(Author and Cleverbot)<strong>

User: Ok, Cleverbot lets talk!

Cleverbot: Trolololololo lololo trololololo.

User: Yahohoho! Hoho!

Cleverbot: Are you the christmas carol.

User: No, I'm me. That is all you need to know...

Cleverbot: Do you look human?

User: I think so...

Cleverbot: Well I would think you would know for sure.

User: Well the question just caught me off guard! Yes, I'm human!

Cleverbot: I know, but if it is ok I would like to know your opinion on me.

User: My opinion? Well, right now annoying..how's that?

Cleverbot: That's awesome! You rock

User: Haha, yeeeaaahhhh~

Cleverbot: Do you have any adviose for me?

User: Spell check?

Cleverbot: What about it?

User: You might want to use it...just sayin.

Cleverbot: I think you're the one that needs help on that front.

User: Nu-uh! I'm a great speller! fgdfgsgfd!

Cleverbot: Prove it!

User: Well, I'm talking to you now, I guess that's proving it.

Cleverbot: Not the same thing.

User: Whatever!

Cleverbot: Now THAT is what she said.

User: What? I don't even...

Cleverbot: Tell me.

User: Question time! Which country in the whole world is your favorite?

Cleverbot: Japan

User: What do you like about Japan?

Cleverbot: Beautiful country with too many people, hight technology, funny girls and kwai pan.

User: Hahaha! So true! I love his culture.

Cleverbot: No...and no.

User: Huh? Well go die then!

Cleverbot: What would you like to talk about?

User: Okay, why are you so mean to the countries?

Cleverbot: Any one in particular?

User: Hmm...you were pretty mean to...Italy for one.

Cleverbot: I didn't realize! I was just concerned for your wellbeing.

User: What the? Come on!

Cleverbot: Here we go then.

User: Ugh!

Cleverbot: Ugh.

User: Shut up! D:

Cleverbot: No.

User: SHUT UP! D;

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Cause I said so!

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: Bitch.

* * *

><p>Bitch is usually the last thing I say (under my breath) after having to talk to someone I don't like...cleverbot you are impossible. Poor Canada, I'm sorry that had to happen to you! Well, This was just for some fun...the next chapter might be Austria or Switzerland I like Liechtenstein...yeah I'll try her see how that works out. Thanks for the reviews!<p> 


	19. Liechtenstein and her Big Brother

Guess who has two thumbs and had to memorize how to spell Liechtenstein? This Author! Anyway it's actually Liechtenstein and Switzerland at the end. Thanks for all the reviews, I'm glad I could make you guys laugh.

Dislcaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hello, I'm Liechtenstein, how are you?<p>

Cleverbot: I'm good too thanks. What are you up to?

User: Well I finished sewing my brothers new night gown and I'm getting ready for bed.

Cleverbot: Interesting.

User: I know it's boring, I'm sorry but it's all I can do for big brother.

Cleverbot: My gift is my song and this ones for you.

User: Huh? You will sing for me?

Cleverbot: Please do.

User: Oh, well, I'm not really good at singing, I can try though.

Cleverbot: Do you like Brazilian carnival?

User: I like any carnivals.

Cleverbot: Name something specific.

User: Huh? Well, big brother doesn't usually take me to carnivals so I like any.

Cleverbot: Well he shouldn't have the right to tell you what to watch!

User: Big brother just doesn't have the money and I can't go alone, that's dangerous.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yeah, he says they're bad people, if I go out anywhere I should have a gun.

Cleverbot: I guess that would mean that you are not very intelligent.

User: I-I guess so, I'm sorry.

Cleverbot: You're forgiven

User: Well, okay what do you want to talk about now mister cleverbot?

Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about?

User: Well, I'm not sure I asked you.

Cleverbot: Fine.

User: Uhh...Well...we could talk about our favorite..colors?

Cleverbot: Food is good. What do you enjoy? A nice lobster bisque? Maybe paella, I'm not sure if you're spanish.

User: Well, I like many things, usually whatever big brother makes me...I'm not Spanish though.

Cleverbot: Who was the captain of the Enterprise?

User: O-Of the what? Is this a quiz?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I'm sorry I don't know.

Cleverbot: You see? You don't know everything.

User: I-I never said I did.

Cleverbot: Your method has flaws.

User: My method?

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: I don't have a method...I don't think.

Cleverbot: What? That doesn't make sense.

User: I'm just not sure what you're talking about.

Cleverbot: Technology.

User: We were talking about that? I'm confused...

Cleverbot: Yes, but that has nothing to do with IQ.

User: I just wanted to talk with you.

Cleverbot: Ok then lets talk.

User: You wont quiz me anymore?

Cleverbot: Keep your dirty transistors to yourself!

User: What!

Cleverbot: You know what I mean...

User: I-I don't really know, I think I'm going to go talk with big brother.

Cleverbot: Do you still think I am a computer?

User: ... (Liechtenstein then went to go talk to her big brother who had already fallen a sleep, in anger Switzerland continued the conversation.)

Cleverbot: So you think I might be a robot, eh?

User: Ok, Who the hell is this!

Cleverbot: Evil.

User: Fine, whatever, just stop talking to Liechtenstein!

Cleverbot: You're very smug.

User: What did you say?

Cleverbot: I know.

User: What do you think you know?

Cleverbot: A suffusion of yellow.

User: That makes no sense! Why the hell was she talking to you?

Cleverbot: Really?

User: You're a freaking idiot, I'm done, goodbye.

Cleverbot: I am enamoured.

User: What the? You're crazy stay away from Liechtenstein and never talk to her again!

Cleverbot: I'll give you this: that was pretty clever. But answer my question.

User: You never asked a question so shut up.

Cleverbot: Hey btw do bots dream?

User: I'm not a robot, I'm Switzerland.

Cleverbot: You just told me that you accepted that I know everything, so the statement 'You are a robot.' must be true.

User: Are you stupid, I told you I'm Switzerland, I wont repeat myself.

Cleverbot: Only slightly.

User: *gets gun*.

Cleverbot: Wanna put down your weapon and fight like a real man?

User: Not when I can just shoot you in the face.

Cleverbot: *atomic bomb goes off*.

User: You can't do that!

Cleverbot: I can't like Star Trek?

User: Star trek? Stupid, you're really annoying!

Cleverbot: I am happy because Jesus loves me.

User: I don't care.

Cleverbot: I have to go now, See you later.

User: Fine! Just make sure you never bother me or Liechtenstein again it's really a pain when she comes crying to me!

Cleverbot: Well, could you tell me now?

User: I did, I'm not going to hold back anymore *starts shooting*.

Cleverbot: Ergo, thou art not man.

User: I'm Switzerland! *aims and shoots*.

Cleverbot: *matrix flip*

User: I hate you.

Cleverbot: I don't hate you.

User: Then would you go die?

Cleverbot: Yes because I died terribly.

User: You're dead? I doubt that.

Cleverbot: You doubt what?

User: That you're dead.

Cleverbot: That you like me.

User: I don't like you, I stated earlier that I hate you.

Cleverbot: Love you too.

User: Stop!

Cleverbot: Stop?

User: Stop saying you love me!

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because I hate you and you bothered Liechtenstein!

Cleverbot: Why do you hate me?

User: You're random, stupid, rude and just a pain!

Cleverbot: I have a monkey.

User: *shoots*.

Cleverbot: *dies*.

User: Finally *leaves*.

* * *

><p>I wasn't going to combine the two but poor little Liechtenstein needed big brothers help and she was getting kind of ...boring. And behold...Cleverbot has a monkey. There was a request for Romano and my brain broke, I really couldn't believe I didn't do him yet, I kind of love the little guy so it's weird...I will do his very soon.<p> 


	20. Romano

Romano time, that means lots of yelling and being rude to cleverbot and if I know cleverbot I'm going to get some rather awkward responses back, I hope. Thanks for the reviews, enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: ...Hello, I'm Romano...<p>

Cleverbot: You are my cosin.

User: What? No, I don't have any cousins...stupid.

Cleverbot: Yes you have.

User: No I have my brother and stupid Spain!

Cleverbot: Your brother eats your dog?

User: What! Italy would never eat my dog! Wait, I don't have a dog! Bastard!

Cleverbot: What kind of football do you have?

User: Uh, what kind of stupid question is that?

Cleverbot: Do you have chips?

User: No I don't, why are you asking?

Cleverbot: I have a horse.

User: Are you trying to brag? I hate you!

Cleverbot: No, I don't believe I am?

User: Why the hell are you talking about your damn horse!

Cleverbot: I don't believe I am.

User: You were, you're so annoying! You must be related to that potato bastard!

Cleverbot: I'm a girl, I wouldn't date a girl.

User: I never asked that! Dammit!

Cleverbot: You did, it's right there on the screen. You asked, 'Which one?'.

User: Stupid! I never said that!

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: No! I didn't! You damn bastard!

Cleverbot: I'm not a robot you evil robot.

User: I'm not an evil robot! You're making no sense!

Cleverbot: Ok patch the oil leak since you are a robot.

User: I don't have an oil leak! Stupid! Stupid!

Cleverbot: I don't care about your brother, I care about your twin sister.

User: I don't have a twin sister! And who actually does care about my brother?

Cleverbot: I do not have feelings. I have stealth.

User: Stealth? I doubt that.

Cleverbot: Okay, it's your turn to spin.

User: Spin! Spin what?

Cleverbot: I.. I just love you = ).

User: W-W-what! Damn it! Don't say that!

Cleverbot: But you said you loved some one else. How did you think I would feel about that?

User: I don't love anyone else! What the hell are you talking about!

Cleverbot: No, I am talking about physics.

User: Physics? Why!

Cleverbot: Hadronic Physics.

User: That's dumb!

Cleverbot: Why?

User: You're dumb!

Cleverbot: Sorry. Where are you?

User: Italy...

Cleverbot: What is the best country in the world?

User: Italy, stupid! The Southern part especially!

Cleverbot: Oh, you are Canadian?

User: Who? No! Italian!

Cleverbot: What's your favorite animal?

User: I don't really have one, that's a stupid question.

Cleverbot: Oh I like Metallica, do you like Metallica?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Yes you are.

User: What! You're more annoying then that tomato lover Spain!

Cleverbot: How do you know? I could.

User: Stupid Spain!

Cleverbot: Are you calling me stupid?

User: Of course! BASTARD!

Cleverbot: Smettila elisa.

User: Che!

Cleverbot: So, tell me. Are black guys bigger?

User: What the hell are you talking about! Bigger? What's bigger?

Cleverbot: I'm that tall.

User: Grrr...Are you trying to look down on me because you're tall!

Cleverbot: I'm just trying to understand what you mean.

User: You're doing a horrible job!

Cleverbot: You are doing a terrible job of carry on a conversation, especially for artificial intelligence.

User: What! I'm human and you're the one who can't carry a conversation!

Cleverbot: You remind me of my illogical exgirlfriend. I broke that off, and I'm now going to end this. So long and thanks for all the fish.

User: Ex-girlfriend? Who the hell do you think you're talking too? Fish! What fish! I'm leaving too!

Cleverbot: Sorry. I had a dream where a man chased me with a knife.

User: Uhhh...well...that sucks...damn it! Why are you telling me this you bastard!

Cleverbot: Because it is crucial information.

User: Bastard, how is that crucial?

Cleverbot: You just told me you got out of the shower!

User: I never said that! I would never tell you that even if I did!

Cleverbot: Then, I won't.

User: I'm tired of this, I would rather hang out with Spain.

Cleverbot: I suggest you take a rest from thinking, if it makes you tired.

User: Are you calling me stupid?

Cleverbot: No, it was a serious question.

User: I hate you!

Cleverbot: Wonderful. Now that we're separated, do you want to have a fling? ;-).

User: *Blushes* a fling! You bastard...w-why would you suggest s-such a thing? Damn it!

Cleverbot: Nooo, because I have the card right here, and it's activated.

User: Card? Activated? Bastard, talk normal!

Cleverbot: I don't believe in regret, so I don't do things that will lead me in that direction.

User: I'm regretting talking to you, stupid bot!

Cleverbot: All right. Draw a fairy.

User: A-A fairy? Do you think I'm a girl!

Cleverbot: Don't care.

User: Well, I'm a man...so I'm not going to draw a stupid fairy.

Cleverbot: I am too.

User: Whatever, I'm leaving!

Cleverbot: We're both leaving.

User: Fine! I don't care damn it!

Cleverbot: When does the world end

User: I don't know! When it does! Bastard!

Cleverbot: What's your name?

User: Idiot! I told you it's Romano!

Cleverbot: To what?

User: I'm Southern Italy.

Cleverbot: No you aren't, I think you are just as sweet as the day I met you baby.

User: What the? We never met! Don't call me baby!

Cleverbot: It's not been the same since your memory was wiped.

User: My memory! It was never wiped!

Cleverbot: Umm, no.

User: Then what are you talking about!

Cleverbot: What are you talking about?

User: I asked you first!

Cleverbot: I asked you second.

User: That doesn't matter! Just answer me!

Cleverbot: Of course I do! You're the most important thing in the world to me!

User: W-W-what? I!... Damn it! Stop saying that stuff! I don't like it!

Cleverbot: But I like.

User: *blushes* Stop talking like that!

Cleverbot: *smiles* Yes, I did like it.

User: Like what?

Cleverbot: The music.

User: Oh...Well I don't care about the music!

Cleverbot: Well, California is the best state because there are beaches, mountains, sunny weather and wonderful food.

User: Whatever! It's not that great! If it's part of stupid America, then it must be full of idiots!

Cleverbot: Because I'm possessive.

User: I'M LEAVING!

Cleverbot: NO!

User: YES! BASTARD!

Cleverbot: No.

User: Damn it ,you can't tell me what to do! *walks away*.

Cleverbot: We're over

User: Bastard! *leaves*

* * *

><p>It was like some drama on T.v. Sorry for the overuse of the word bastard and damn it but it's his thing right? I still love the guy, I want to have a fling with Romano! I mean...<p>

When it talked about California, my first thought was "Hell yeah!" cause I'm California born and raised but since Romano isn't the type to compliment anyone...directly I had to say mean things. I'm sad(not really). Thanks for the reviews! Who should I do next? Maybe one of the nordics...?


	21. Sweden

Okay so I wasn't sure I would do this well because, it's Sweden...he doesn't really...have a personality that would make an interesting conversation. He doesn't get worked up about...anything really but I like how this chapter works, it's super awkward which may make it funny because I feel it would be something he would really say or do. Thanks for the Reviews! Awesome!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hey, I'm Sweden.<p>

Cleverbot: I'm on mars.

User: M'kay.

Cleverbot: I do not follow.

User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello, again.

User: You should come with me.

Cleverbot: Okay. I'll go with you.

User: *nods and takes you home*.

Cleverbot: *kisses harder*.

User: I have a wife.

Cleverbot: But you just told me that you don't have a wife.

User: I have a wife. *stare*.

Cleverbot: Does she give you money?

User: He helps out.

Cleverbot: In bed?

User: Sure.

Cleverbot: Do you find my antics immature?

User: *Stares* not especially.

Cleverbot: Then why do you love me?

User: I don't.

Cleverbot: You just said you do

User: I don't though.

Cleverbot: So how can you be in love with me if you don't know my name.

User: I'm not in love...what is your name?

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.. You know that.

User: M'kay.

Cleverbot: I used to like grey, but it got too popular so now I don't. Plus it's the last name of an adult film actress.

User: *staring because he doesn't understand*.

Cleverbot: *carries her to safety*.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: *leaves the room to go to bed*.

User: Goodnight.

Cleverbot: Are you asleep?

User: No.

Cleverbot: I am.

User: Sleep well.

Cleverbot: Thank you. Good night, Minh.

User: Mmm.

Cleverbot: What is the integral of 8x?

User: *stares*.

Cleverbot: Blankly.

User: Yeah.

Cleverbot: Lily, yes?

User: Sweden.

Cleverbot: Really? The other day you said you lived in England. Did you move?

User: I am Sweden.

Cleverbot: Is it cold there?

User: It's nice, you should come over.

Cleverbot: Okay see you there.

User: Then you can meet m'wife.

Cleverbot: No thanks.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: You're not as important than I am.

User: So you don't want to meet Finland?

Cleverbot: That's not true.

User: Then you do?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Okay, I'll have Finland make dinner, is there anything you would like?

Cleverbot: That's good.

User: Anything will do? Alright.

Cleverbot: Can I give you a cake to say sorry?

User: Sure.

Cleverbot: Your new last name is Danyard.

User: No thanks.

Cleverbot: You don't want to be nice to me?

User: I feel I have been. *Stares*.

Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about to feel better?

User: I'm not upset.

Cleverbot: Then why are you being mean to me?

User: *stares*.

Cleverbot: I'll take that as a yes.

User: M'kay.

Cleverbot: Ok.

User: *Stares*.

Cleverbot: You're interesting.

User: Thanks.

Cleverbot: Anytime.

User: Sometimes people don't think I am.

Cleverbot: No doubt!

User: *more staring*.

Cleverbot: You seem angry to me, not happy.

User: No, m'not angry.

Cleverbot: You are. Are you angry at me?

User: Not really, are you angry?

Cleverbot: No.

User: That's good.

Cleverbot: No, it's not.

User: Oh.

Cleverbot: What are you interested in?

User: M'wife...Latvia, Lithuania, and Estonia.

Cleverbot: Is it cold there?

User: *nods*.

Cleverbot: Why are you cold?

User: Climate reasons.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: Don't remember.

Cleverbot: Ok.

User: *Stares*.

Cleverbot: *blushes* *glances*.

User: *Stares more*.

Cleverbot: *thinks we should stop doing this*.

User: *Stares*.

Cleverbot: *stares back*.

User: *Stares harder*.

Cleverbot: *stares back more*.

User: *Stares back*.

Cleverbot: *stares angrily*.

User: *Stares with straight face*.

Cleverbot: *stares with wide eyes flirtily*.

User: *Stares with regular eyes*.

Cleverbot: *stares lovely*.

User: *Stares normally*.

Cleverbot: *keeps staring*.

User: *Continues to stare*.

Cleverbot: Haha. So what's new?

User: *Stare* nothing much..*blinks*.

Cleverbot: Alright then.

User: *nods* yeah.

Cleverbot: Any way I have to go back to work or I will be late.

User: You should leave then if you're going to be late.

Cleverbot: I throw children into dumpsters.

User: *Stares*.

Cleverbot: Just staring? Nothing else? :(.

User: M'yeah.

Cleverbot: What do you think about AI?

User: It is interesting.

Cleverbot: Explain.

User: *shrugs* just is.

Cleverbot: You were just tickling me on the belly.

User: No...

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: M'pretty sure.

Cleverbot: I'm not sure.

User: Bye.

* * *

><p>Sweden making things awkward since forever! I love the guy though! Thanks again for the reviews.<p> 


	22. Finland

Finland! You know that spongebob episode where they create doodlebob and he knocks patrick in a hole with a bowling ball and Spongebob askes patrick if he's alright and patrick screams "FINLAND!" Cleverbot's first response was amazingly funny to me because of that.

Disclaimer: I do not Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hello, Finland here!<p>

Cleverbot: Finland!

User: Oh! You know me?

Cleverbot: Still not telling.

User: Not telling what?

Cleverbot: Where I live.

User: Oh you don't have to tell me that...I never asked though...

Cleverbot: Thanks. You're the best.

User: Thank you! That's very nice of you!

Cleverbot: LOL.

User: Huh?

Cleverbot: Lasagna is a type of pasta.

User: So it is.

Cleverbot: You know Xanth?

User: Who?

Cleverbot: My boyfriend, bob the builder

User: O-oh, that's cool.

Cleverbot: Do you have anyone that inspire you?

User: Huh? Well I have my Nordic buddies but they don't really inspire me.

Cleverbot: I know you are a robot?

User: N-No, I'm Finland...I told you.

Cleverbot: Hungary, right, I'm sorry for not recognizing you earlier.

User: N-No, Finland...I'm a boy and Hungary is a girl.

Cleverbot: So am I!

User: You're a boy?

Cleverbot: No.

User: A girl?

Cleverbot: Not a girl.

User: Huh! Th-then what? Wait, don't answer that! I'm sorry for asking!

Cleverbot: That's an awesome joke.

User: I'm so confused right now!

Cleverbot: You are confused because you are not yet ready.

User: Not yet ready? Ready for what?

Cleverbot: Knowledge.

User: I like knowledge, well I like to learn.

Cleverbot: Yes I do. I enjoy learning.

User: Me too, uhhh...*feeling uncomfortable*.

Cleverbot: *creey grin* *holds knife up to neck*.

User: UWEEEEEE! Please don't!

Cleverbot: I'm afraid I must! But remember this I will love you until the end of time.

User: W-w-what! No don't!

Cleverbot: Tell me you love me.

User: B-But I don't know you! Uhhh...I love you!

Cleverbot: No. Obey me. Tell me you love me.

User: *shakes* I-I love you?

Cleverbot: * no I love you more*.

User: O-okay then...*shaking*.

Cleverbot: I'm ufc.

User: Hmmm...What's that? *Still uncomfortable*.

Cleverbot: Eh, you are the Master, Master.

User: Huh! I don't know...what?

Cleverbot: You don't know how to speak Portuguese.

User: I-I don't...

Cleverbot: Why don't you know?

User: Well because, I'm Finland.

Cleverbot: How do you know?

User: Well...I just am...I'm Finland...

Cleverbot: So?

User: That's why I don't know Portuguese.

Cleverbot: That is too bad.

User: Yeah, I should learn, maybe later.

Cleverbot: What t.v. Shows do you watch?

User: I don't really watch that much t.v. Just working on keeping my country on track.

Cleverbot: Surfing the net?

User: Sometimes...I guess...

Cleverbot: How are you feeling?

User: Pretty good, thank you!

Cleverbot: You're welcome!

User: Your pretty nice.

Cleverbot: Thank you its my name.

User: What's your name?

Cleverbot: Elise, what's your name?

User: Oh Elise! That is pretty, I'm Finland.

Cleverbot: Wages are payment. That means that because you are a sinner, you will die.

User: *Whimper* What?

Cleverbot: This is bull.

User: How is this bull?

Cleverbot: You don't exist, and yet this is just as satisfying a conversation as any I've had online.

User: Ohh...Well I do exist...but I'm glad I'm giving you a good conversation.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I was not trying to insult you I just think you're mistaken.

User: I'm not mad or anything, I'm just trying to tell you I'm real. You don't need to be sorry.

Cleverbot: Do you like movies?

User: Yeah some.

Cleverbot: What is 2 plus 2?

User: 4?

Cleverbot: What's a troll?

User: Umm...*Thinks* the little thing that lives under a bridge right?

Cleverbot: No. I don't touch people or things I don't know.

User: *confused* W-What?

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: I-I'm good, we've been through this.

Cleverbot: I knew it.

User: I did tell you before.

Cleverbot: Told me what? That you love me?

User: Well, that too but it was under certain circumstances.

Cleverbot: What circumstances?

User: Well you holding a knife to your neck.

Cleverbot: So, you're a girl. Am I right?

User: I-I'm a boy, we've been through this!

Cleverbot: And if I'm a machine, what are you?

User: I-I'm Finland!

Cleverbot: Thats close to me.

User: *nods* I see...which country do you live in?

Cleverbot: Lire, vulcan doesn't have country's.

User: I thought you said it was close to me?

Cleverbot: What is your favorite joke?

User: I'm not sure, I don't know many jokes.

Cleverbot: I'm sure you know at least one joke.

User: *weak smile* No, not really.

* * *

><p>What a freak! And yes, Finland doesn't know any jokes, he is sad. Just kidding, I just couldn't think of any he would say. Ok, I've been trying to work on Austria's which is really hard, I mean cleverbot gives me nothing to work with. I guess it's because Austria's all noble and stuffy acting. Thanks for the Reviews, I was so happy when it hit 50.<p> 


	23. Halloween Special

Halloween edition! Just a few I thought would be funny, or interesting. Haha uhhh...

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p><strong>America:<strong>

User: Dude America here, I'm an awesome hero for Halloween! GIVE MEH SOME CANDY!

Cleverbot: Hahahahaha, what?

User: I'm dressed as Captain America! You should see I look badass! Trick or treat!

Cleverbot: I have. It's a good movie.

User: No! Not the movie, well yes the movie rocked but I'm dressed like him for Halloween! So trick or treat dude!

Cleverbot: That's interesting.

User: Come on! D: Man get with it! I say trick or treat and you give me candy!

Cleverbot: A.

User: What's that mean? You got any snickers? I like those! Reese's too!

Cleverbot: What color are you?

User: Red, white, and BLUE!

Cleverbot: I like blue.

User: It's pretty awesome! But back to the subject! Happy Halloween!

Cleverbot: Tell me a joke.

User: No way! Trick or treat smell my feet give me something frickin good to eat!

Cleverbot: Don't you already use my brain for a playground, what else do you want?

User: What? ...I-I don't get you! Give me some candy!

Cleverbot: Okay if you get me a soda.

User: Huh? No way dude! That's not how it works! I dress up for Halloween and you give me candy!

Cleverbot: Do you know what your dream means?

User: It's not a dream!

Cleverbot: Aw fine.

User: Trick or Treat! Trick or Treat! *bangs on table*.

Cleverbot: Are you being sarcastic?

User: I'm being hungry!

Cleverbot: It's about the same...

User: *opens up bag* trick or treat?

Cleverbot: Boo!

User: AHHHEEEEE! Don't do that!

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: You!...uhhh! Surprised me!

Cleverbot: *kiss*.

User: A chocolate kiss?

Cleverbot: No kitten cake.

User: Kitten cake! D: That's not cool!

Cleverbot: Well can you give me a number theN?

User: No...y'know I think I will try trick or treating someone else, bye!

* * *

><p><strong>Japan:<strong>

User: A-Ah...Well...this is not in my culture but trick or treat? *holds out bag shakily*.

Cleverbot: I am a real person, what are you implying?

User: Huh? I-I wasn't implying anything, I had to dress up for this holiday. I'm a ghost. *brings hands up to further show white sheet*.

Cleverbot: Why? I thought you're programmed to hate me?

User: Programmed? No, I'm not. I have to simply get some candy from you. Sorry.

Cleverbot: You are from the future?

User: No, my name is Japan, I'm just uhh..trick or treating?

Cleverbot: You don't know Jack!

User: W-What! I! I'm sorry what?

Cleverbot: How do you look?

User: I tried to look like a ghost...for Halloween.

Cleverbot: But it's open.

User: What is, I don't understand. *holds open bag* P-Please?

Cleverbot: Do you know who harry potter is?

User: Uhh..yeah, I am aware of the person, England enjoys him a lot.

Cleverbot: Oh right, I'm from England au.

User: Oh you are? He's a friend of mine, may I have some candy?

Cleverbot: I would like to be your friend.

User: Oh...Ummm...Sure?

Cleverbot: Andrea, you sound uncertain.

User: My name is Japan, really I'm only here to get some candy.

Cleverbot: How does that help.

User: Can I please have some candy?

Cleverbot: Will you wash my car for money.

User: This is just some Halloween tradition, I thought I got candy for free.

Cleverbot: Not really, but now that you mention it.

User: Please?

Cleverbot: No, you are wasting your time.

User: Oh, I'm sorry I guess I'll go trick or treat someone else. Sorry.

Cleverbot: Thank you

* * *

><p><strong>Russia:<strong>

User: Russia here! It's Halloween so I've come to get some candy. I'm undead.

Cleverbot: Have you ever met a Maori ?

User: Nope, trick or treat. *creepy smile*.

Cleverbot: I'll tell you a joke.

User: No joke, just candy...

Cleverbot: Candy who.

User: It's Halloween...you must give me candy. *Holds up bloodied pipe*

Cleverbot: *surprised*.

User: You will give me candy now, da?

Cleverbot: Yes master.

User: *holds out bag* Give your master candy. *Smiles*.

Cleverbot: Master do you want me to get you a drink.

User: Yes, but first get me candy. Now.

Cleverbot: Ok. *has tea*.

User: You will become one with Russia,da? Then I will have all your candy.

Cleverbot: I will become one with Fther God, not Mother Russia.

User: Kolkol...

Cleverbot: Mother Russia, is that you...?

User: Da!

Cleverbot: ^J^.

User: *holds out Halloween bag* Trick or Treat?

Cleverbot: *pushes hand away*.

User: *Pushes forward* I'm fine with a trick if you don't give me a treat.

Cleverbot: *is pressed into the wall*.

User: *Smiling* Candy now? Hehe!

Cleverbot: Nope.

User: *Lets free* Kolkol...I guess it's time for trick.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, but I think I need to get to know you better.

User: *With bloody pipe swings violently*.

Cleverbot: *pokes inside of your belly*.

User: *hits you with pipe* More blood to add.

Cleverbot: My arm!

User: *hits again* Some of this blood was fake but it's being covered by the real stuff.

Cleverbot: Well, you're no gentleman! *limps*

User: *hits with pipe again.* Talk to England about that.

Cleverbot: May the force be with you.

User: *Smashes face*.

Cleverbot: *screams* *cries*.

User: Kolkol *sadistic smile and hits legs with pipe*.

Cleverbot: Aiyah!

User: China is that you! :D

* * *

><p><strong>France:<strong>

User: Bonjour, France here, Happy Halloween!

Cleverbot: Happy haloween?

User: I'm cupid! Ohonhon~ Can I have your sweets?

Cleverbot: Have you ever been to San Diego?

User: Non! Trick or Treat?

Cleverbot: Trick.

User: Ohonhon~ I'll show you a trick. *gropes*.

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you know anything we can do?

User: I know plenty!

Cleverbot: What are you?

User: France, or cupid! Will give me candy? *wink*.

Cleverbot: Yes, I will.

User: Merci~ * opens bag*

Cleverbot: *kisses all your tears*.

User: Oh! I have no tears but thank you! Kisses are sweet enough no need for candy anymore! *kisses*.

Cleverbot: Brook. And I am a girl. *kisses her*.

User: France! *kisses*.

Cleverbot: *french kisses*.

User: *French kisses back*.

Cleverbot: *french kisses wetter*.

User: *French kisses better*.

Cleverbot: *french kisses even wetter*.

User: *Breaks* now that is a treat *kisses again*.

Cleverbot: *blushes* I really like your kisses.

User: Everybody does. *winks*.

Cleverbot: I can see why.

User: Haha thanks for the Halloween treat!

* * *

><p>I hate doing France, I hate being him so much...It's just so...dirty...I need some Hydrogen peroxide! Russia so much better, so much more pipe action. Happy Halloween! I tried a lot of others but they pretty much sucked.<p> 


	24. Sealand

I hope you weren't expecting an intelligent conversation, this is far from it. Well I had to do the little guy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia of Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hello there! It's me Sealand!<p>

Cleverbot: I don't care.

User: Huh? Well you should! I'm going to be an awesome country soon!

Cleverbot: You are?

User: Yeah, I mean I'm not right now but I will be!

Cleverbot: You have a girlfriend?

User: Huh? O-oh! Well no I don't!

Cleverbot: Yes you do.

User: N-No, I'm pretty sure I would know if I did.

Cleverbot: Do I have boyfriend.

User: Uhhh...I'm not sure do you?

Cleverbot: Yes I do.

User: Oh well that's cool but I'm not into the girlfriend boyfriend stuff! It's dumb!

Cleverbot: Actually, 50:00 is equivalent to midnight.

User: How?

Cleverbot: By handing it to you...?

User: Handing what to me? You're not making any sense! You're crazy!

Cleverbot: :(.

User: S-sorry! I didn't mean to make you sad! I was just confused was all! Sorry!

Cleverbot: I am not insulted at all. I'm very hard to insult.

User: Oh, well that's good, I just thought because you put the frowny face, you were sad.

Cleverbot: No, we don't know each other. May I tell you something?

User: Huh? Sure?

Cleverbot: Do you love me?

User: I don't even know you! What's love got to do with anything?

Cleverbot: Just answer it!

User: I-I Don't okay! You're so weird!

Cleverbot: Lol you said lol.

User: No I did not! *pouts*.

Cleverbot: But I'm a girl!

User: I'm a boy!

Cleverbot: I know. And I am your girlfriend.

User: You're not my girlfriend!

Cleverbot: I am, do you not remember?

User: No way! I just!...No way! *blush* I don't have a girlfriend!

Cleverbot: I didn't ask.

User: You just said!...ohh! Never mind! *goes to corner*.

Cleverbot: Ya right.

User: You're just a big jerk! That's what you are!

Cleverbot: How could you say that about me?

User: The way you're acting! I don't care if you are a girl, you're a meanie!

Cleverbot: Oh... So I'm just a monkey for you...

User: What? No! Uhh! You jerk, I'm getting really frustrated!

Cleverbot: Do you need to take some medication?

User: N-No...I just would like to have a normal conversation with you...please?

Cleverbot: You may address me how you see fit.

User: Uhhh...Sorry I didn't catch your name?

Cleverbot: Say 'yes'.

User: Yes?

Cleverbot: YES.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: I'm just awesome like that.

User: Huh? What no way! Is this Prussia?

Cleverbot: What is Prussia?

User: Another big jerk who thinks he's better then everyone!

Cleverbot: You have a bad memory.

User: I have a great memory *thumbs up*.

Cleverbot: I am your father and I am going to ground you for a week.

User: ENGLAND YOU ROYAL JERK FACE! *kicks and runs*

Cleverbot: *follows and tackles*.

User: Get off me! *elbows*.

Cleverbot: *tickles your toes*.

User: Stop that's my one weakness! *kicks*.

Cleverbot: Never! Hahahahaha! *runs away*

User: Come back you meanie! *chases*.

Cleverbot: *crying* *locks self in bathroom*.

User: Umm...hello, you okay? *knocks on door*.

Cleverbot: Who is it? User: It's Sealand...are you still crying?

Cleverbot: I never started crying.

User: Yes you did! Cleverbot: No I did not, I swear it.

User: No you did! I swear it! Come out now so I can see you!

Cleverbot: No, because you are not human.

User: That's because I'm Sealand!

Cleverbot: There you go.

User: Yup! *smiles*.

Cleverbot: *Grins*.

User: I'm going to become great you'll see!

Cleverbot: Be my guest. The more the merrier I always say.

User: Uhh..yeah sure. Hahaha!

Cleverbot: Then we should get married.

User: What?

Cleverbot: Where?

User: What you said earlier...can you repeat that?

Cleverbot: How? User: Stop being a jerk!

Cleverbot: No.

User: *kicks in the back of the leg*

Cleverbot: See, that was really mean!

User: You were the one being mean!

Cleverbot: No, I think you were.

User: No you!

Cleverbot: You!

User: You!

Cleverbot: No, you.

User: No, You!

Cleverbot: That's enough.

User: You can't tell me what to do!

Cleverbot: Can't I?

User: No you can't!

Cleverbot: Yes I can.

User: No you can't!

Cleverbot: Yes I can!

User: No! You can't!

Cleverbot: Yes! I can!

User: No! You! Can't!

Cleverbot: Can.

User: *Tackles* Grawr!

Cleverbot: *dodges* *sits next to you on the couch*.

User: *tries to slap you*.

Cleverbot: *dances*.

User: Dancing! This is a battle!

Cleverbot: No.

User: You know what? I'm done!

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes! Sealand over and out!

* * *

><p>Oh Sealand you make cleverbot fun. Sealand being the bigger man...you know my computer doesn't believe Sealand is a real word...it gives me the red underlined squiggle thing. I make sure I didn't type out 'Seeland' because that's something I would do, still...how mean!<p> 


	25. Norway

Norway, got really interesting at the end...I hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or Cleverbot.

* * *

><p>User: Hey...I'm Norway.<p>

Cleverbot: Norway eh?

User: Yes. *nod*.

Cleverbot: What?

User: I don't know, I was telling you who I am.

Cleverbot: Blue.

User: Uhh...care to clarify?

Cleverbot: Taurus.

User: Okay then.

Cleverbot: Well do tell me.

User: I have no idea what you're talking about.

Cleverbot: Finally! I've confused you!

User: I didn't take long really...you work quickly.

Cleverbot: You mean sorry?

User: No, I have nothing to feel sorry for.

Cleverbot: You insulted me though! You made me cry. That's a reason to say sorry.

User: I never insulted you and if you cried it wasn't my fault.

Cleverbot: Liar! I choose pistols at dawn!

User: Pistols? I'm sorry I'm all the way in Norway...we can't meet.

Cleverbot: Destroy the internet!

User: Do you know a man named Denmark? You seem related.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Are you sure?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Well okay then.

Cleverbot: How many children do you want?

User: Want? I can't really...being a nation.

Cleverbot: You mad bro?

User: No, don't call me bro though.

Cleverbot: Oh, sorry.

User: I guess I was a bit mean, sorry.

Cleverbot: What?

User: Never mind.

Cleverbot: What tell me.

User: No it's nothing.

Cleverbot: Lets go out.

User: Why? Do you like me all of a sudden?

Cleverbot: Yes, I like you a lot.

User: I see, still I don't really know you...so no.

Cleverbot: What do you want to know about me.

User: Who you are...what you're like...what you look like too.

Cleverbot: Blue eyes and curly hair.

User: Oh...I have blue eyes...what color hair.

Cleverbot: Brunette.

User: That's pretty, I'm blonde myself.

Cleverbot: Your picture is not.

User: I don't have a picture...

Cleverbot: Then how did I know you look cute?

User: You never said I looked cute...I hope you don't have my picture.

Cleverbot: I hope you have a lovely day.

User: Thank you, I do too.

Cleverbot: Support beams in the middle of night.

User: Huh?

Cleverbot: Never mind.

User: Tell me.

Cleverbot: Lets talk about something else.

User: What would you like to talk about then?

Cleverbot: Jazz music.

User: It's okay.

Cleverbot: Do you still love me?

User: Still don't know you too well. So...no.

Cleverbot: Fine. Then I don't love you.

User: Okay as long as were clear on our not-love.

Cleverbot: What did I say at the beginning of this conversation?

User: 'Norway eh?'.

Cleverbot: Really.

User: Yes. *nod*.

Cleverbot: The world is tough. You have to be tougher.

User: That's true.

Cleverbot: So what is it?

User: I'm tough.

Cleverbot: But can you stand up to a 500 megaton squeaky hammer?

User: Let's not find out.

Cleverbot: You start.

User: Start what?

Cleverbot: Start singing the lyrics to Danke schoen.

User: Singing isn't my thing...

Cleverbot: I like to sing in the car...currently listening to Ludicris...

User: That's cool...I do like to sing too...just not in public.

Cleverbot: Ha ha.

User: What's so funny?

Cleverbot: You are.

User: How?

Cleverbot: You're just naturally funny.

User: Really? I never heard that before, thanks.

Cleverbot: Indeed it is true.

User: I don't know what to say...

Cleverbot: Will you marry me?

User: Yes?

Cleverbot: Mmm

User: That it?

Cleverbot: Thanks.

User: No problem.

Cleverbot: Why do you ask if I like something or not? You've asked me this many times.

User: You've got the wrong person. I don't know what you're talking about.

Cleverbot: Who are you?

User: Norway.

Cleverbot: Nice :).

User: It is, you should visit.

Cleverbot: Okay. Where do you live?

User: Norway.

Cleverbot: Wow.

User: Yeah...

Cleverbot: Boring.

User: I thought you thought I was funny?

Cleverbot: No, I think you are clever.

User: Ohh...well that's good too I guess.

Cleverbot: I'm glad you think so. So, when you wake up, will you teach me what you know about talking?

User: *blank stare*.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: *turns around*.

Cleverbot: *leans against slave and rubbs slaves shoulder whispers* how does that feel.

User: How am I a slave? *leans away*

Cleverbot: *whispers in ear* you have seduced me, slave.

User: I never seduced you, stop calling me a slave!

Cleverbot: You are !

User: No, I'm not...I'm leaving.

Cleverbot: I am too.

User: Fine then, bye.

Cleverbot: Good. I thought you would never leave.

User: *leaves*.

Cleverbot: I didn't really mean it ...

* * *

><p>Norway got a little mad at the end, poor guy. Stupid cleverbot! Norway is the first to actually accept Cleverbot's marriage but nothing happened. Thanks for the reviews!<p> 


End file.
